


Blood and Bone

by Gothicsouthpaw30



Series: The Saga of Durin's Heir [2]
Category: The Hobbit, The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Character Death, Cousins, Curses, Death, Family Drama, Father/Daughter Relationships, Gen, Heartache, Love, Magical Females, Multi, Prophetic Dreams, Uncle/Niece Relationships, Unrequited Love, non-canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-08
Updated: 2014-04-27
Packaged: 2018-01-11 13:50:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 24
Words: 21,790
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1173822
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gothicsouthpaw30/pseuds/Gothicsouthpaw30
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Second Book of my series: "The Saga of Durin's Heir." Enjoy!!</p><p>On their way to the Iron Hills a horrible event comes to fruition before Sada's very eyes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sada and her mother and brother head to the Iron Hills

“We’ve ridden for hours!”

“Yes, my love, it’s been a long trip but we’re almost to the Iron Hills. We’ll reach Dain’s home before sundown you’ll see.”

“My ass hurts!”

“Thrain! If yer father heard such language he’d whoop ye!”

Sada pressed her lips together, stifling her laughter, as her mother continued to scold her little brother as they rode on ahead of her.

The journey was boring, unbearably long, and the boys foul language had been needed. A brief moment, for only Sada, in a moment filled with uneasiness and indescribable fear.

Her mother had queried about it, wondered why her eldest child could not sleep for long, and why She seemed so alert and anxious ever since their journey had started. 

Sada had lied of course, she knew her mother knew she was being deceitful, and with a sigh Sada dropped her head and swallowed the rising fear and urge to turn her pony and gallop back to Ered Luin as fast as she could.

Nothing, absolutely nothing, had given her any reason to fear the dream. But even that was terrifying.

If the dream proved untrue, and Sada shivered, that didn’t mean that there was no danger!

It didn’t mean…

Her eyes lifted and Sada stared at her mother’s back.

‘Maybe there’s still time,’ She thought, ‘Maybe I can pretend to panic…turn the pony and ride! She’ll have to follow!’

“Do ye see that dark outline just a few miles ahead? Do ye, lad?” Nola was explaining to a still grumbling Thrain, “We’ll be there in less than an hour!”

Her spirits lifted and Sada asked: “So we’ll be free of the smell of pony at last?”

Nola looked over her shoulder, smiled, and nodded as she said: “And not a moment too soon if ye ask me! These beasts are cute…but I’ve grown tired of them me self and need some time away from them. Just like I do when I’ve had enough of yer Daddy!”

“I’m telling Daddy you said that!” griped Thrain, much to both his mother and sister’s mutual enjoyment.

“Go right on ahead!’ Nola teased her youngest child, giving him a squeeze with her arm that held him close in front of her, “He grows tired of me sometimes as well!”

“What if Ezrin tires of me?” Sada asked, and Nola looked over her shoulder and smirked at the frowning young dwarf, saying nothing at first.

“Doubtful,” Nola explained as she turned her eyes back to the barren road, “You’re quite…a curious dwarf.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Sada demanded with a scoff, “I can’t believe you just said that Mama!”

“I can!” Thrain exclaimed with a giggle that was soon joined by his mother, and Sada’s, own laughter.

But instantly their laughter stilled, in the same moment Nola jerked her pony to a standstill and listened to a sound she knew all to well.

“Mama,” Thrain whimpered, “Is that a wolf?”

“We should ride!” Sada said, seeing the fear in her mother’s eyes, “We can make it!”

Nola shook her head, her eyes widened and her jaw dropped as her gaze went over Sada’s shoulder; Sada felt the fear choke off her breath when she mother stifled her own gasp.

“Ride!” Nola ordered her daughter, “Thrain hold on tight…Sada stay close!”

Sada looked over her shoulder, tears burning at her eyes, and she realized she had done more than dream so many months ago.

She could see them coming! Charging so hard she could hear their paws strike the hard ground. These were no wolves.

“Sada!” Nola shouted, in panic more than fear, “I told you to ride!”


	2. Chapter Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bofur arrives in the Iron Hills and is told of his sisters fate while he contemplates things. Dain has told him on arrival, Sada had hysterically confessed to while recuperating.

She’d arrived, Thrain sobbing wildly as She carried him on her back, shouting and weeping for help. 

She’d left her behind. Alone to be devoured by the beasts!

Her legs felt ready to give out, Her eyes were raw from crying, an when the guards had spotted her they immediately herded the two of them inside knowing whom they were the instant they heard her choke out their names.

Thrain refused to be removed from her, screaming frantically until she swept him into her arms again and demanded to speak to their host.

She swayed, planted her feet more firmly, and gasped: “She’s still out there! You have to go get her because they were still coming when She told us to run!”

Dain had come then, shouting orders and cursing all the while, and grasped her firmly by her shoulders.

“What’s happened?” He demanded, “Where is Nola?”

Sada gulped back a rising sob and shook her head; the fingers of one hand tangled into Thrain’s hair, while the other held him to her waist.

“I…she told us to run,” she whimpered, “The…the wargs…they startled the ponies…Mama was injured…she’s-she’s still out there!”

Dain stiffened, shouted something at one of the guard, and tried in vain to pull Thrain from his sister’s grasp.

“Don’t!” Thrain sobbed, “Where is my Daddy!”

Her vision faded, Sada moaned, and Dain’s harsh pleas went unheeded as her knees gave away.

“She…told me to,” Sada whispered, but darkness took her before she could explain further.  
*************************************************************************************************************************

“Sada, it’s alright love, yer safe!”

She thrashed, weakly still, until she was able to recognize the voice that spoke firmly to her.

“Leave us lass, she’s just scared is all and who could blame ‘er?”

She heard a door open and close and, after relaxing under her Uncle’s gentle touch and soft words, Sada slowly opened her eyes.

Bofur’s hand, warm and reassuring, rested upon her forehead just as her eyes regained their focus and she beheld her beloved uncle at last.

“Uncle Bo,” Sada started to say as she struggled to sit up, “How…what…what’s wrong?”

Bofur, refusing to let his niece sit up, sighed as he stroked her hair and said nothing for a long while.

“Do ye remember anythin’?” He asked softly, Anythin’ at all? Ye’ve been out fer at least two days…the healer’s think it was some kind of shock.”

The horrific reality came back in such a vicious flash that Sada flinched and yelped, and Bofur urged her to be still as gently as he could.

“It’s alright now,” He whispered, “Yer safe.”

“Mama…” Sada whimpered, “I had to!”

“There, there” Bofur urged, his other hand taking his nieces smaller one, “Ye just rest awhile, aye? Don’t think on that fer now!”

“What about Thrain?” Sada demanded, and this time Bofur could do nothing to keep Sada from sitting up, “Where is he?”

“He’s being cared for,” Bofur explained softly, “He’s safe…same as you!”

Sada, to Bofur’s amazement, struggled against him and his determination to keep her in bed.

“Sada!” He urged, “Calm down! It’s alright…would ye like me to bring Thrain to ye?”

“I have to go!” Sada sobbed, “I don’t want him to see me!”

Tears, fresh tears, welled in Bofur’s eyes yet still he bade and physically restrained Sada; at last understanding her fervent urge to rise from her bed.

“Ye hush now!” Bofur pleaded, finally pushing Sada back down, “It will be alright! He’s yer Daddy…and right now he needs ye to be strong!”

It took a few more stressful moments before the last of her desperation subsided and Sada yielded to the softness of the bed.

Bofur sat with her for a few more moments, stroking her hair and saying nothing, before she fell back into an uneasy sleep.

He didn’t blame the child for not wanting to be around when her father, Thorin, arrived. 

As Bofur rose so did his own anxiety. He’d ridden as quickly as he could, ordering Bombur to stay behind, when word reached him in Ered Luin about the Warg attack.  


But, since fate could be cruel, he arrived in the Iron Hills to hear only that his niece and nephew had made it safely to Dain’s home with only a few superficial injuries.

They had been searching before and after Bofur had arrived and the news was horrendous.

‘Parts of her here and there,’ He’d heard one guard whisper as he paced the halls outside of the room where Sada slept, while another whispered of the scouting party discovering scraps of bloody clothing.

‘My dear sister,’ Bofur thought mournfully, ‘I pray ye went quickly…’

Tears again burned at Bofur’s eyes when he silently confessed that, considering the overall matter, hopefully that had been the outcome for someone He’d known since birth and loved more than himself.

Pushing his grief away, and Bofur leaned against the wall, the greatest matter was Thorin; Mahal knew how dear Nola had been to him…what she had helped him through from time to time when sad memories overwhelmed him.

Now, He would be left upon a brink and, depending on how he would absorb this horrendous tragedy…Bofur knew he risked the welfare of two very young and scarred children.

Sada was most at risk. 

She’d seen some of it, according to Dain whom spoken to the girl when she’d regain consciousness here and there before Bofur had come.

Sada had heard Nola scream as the Wargs descended upon her mother, turned and saw them drag her away while Nola had savagely fought them the best she could.

‘There’s just one thing,” Dain had explained to Bofur as he escorted him to where Sada was, “The injury Sada described…it doesn’t make sense that she would be…She should have made it.”

Toy Maker or no, the look Bofur shot the Dwarf Lord at that moment, had caused Him to come to stand still and he’d let Bofur go on alone.

Nola had had some training in fighting, Thorin had taught her some of it, but still she was no warrior!

She was a mother of two very young children and, though it pained him to think upon it, Bofur assumed She’d ordered them ahead while she’d made the decision to stay and face the beasts alone.

Still, and Bofur rubbed his damp eyes as he still leaned against the cold stone wall, some of what Sada had told to Dain echoed in his own mind.

“She kept saying something odd,” The dwarf lord had explained after he’d divulged the fact the wound Nola had suffered hadn’t been severe, “Something about how your sister had ordered her to do it…because Thrain was dying.”


	3. Chapter Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sada meets Ezrin.
> 
> (Filler chapter for now...plus I really had to get him into the story too :-) )

Though it had not been her desire, Sada obeyed her father’s cousin, and dressed in the proper attire in the early morning hours. 

A simple black gown while her hair was bundled up into a tight bun. 

It was customary, after all, that’s how Dain had put it. “Dress in black and keep your emotions inside,” He’d ordered, “Yer father will be under great stress and it won’t do if ye displease him the instant he arrives!”

Thrain was napping in a nearby guest chamber, thankfully, and Sada had stolen the moment of privacy to peruse the halls of Dain’s home. 

Uncle Bofur, bless him, was still taking care of things. The bad things that Sada hated to think about and the things that her dear uncle had had to take care of many times ever since he became the head of his household.

She’d heard some of the discussions, yesterday when she’d managed to rise, between Her Uncle and Dain while they argued in the Dwarf Lord’s study.

Dain had implored Bofur to reconsider his decision to have, what was found of her mother by his scouts, cremated.

It was a long held Durin custom that their loved ones were buried in tombs and, since Thorin had not yet arrived, Dain had argued that Bofur had no authority to deny the custom. 

“Aye,” Bofur agreed, “But can ye tell me it would be what Thorin wants…considering there’s only so much…they didn’t find all of her body!”

Dain had muttered something Sada didn’t catch before He grumbled his acceptance of Bofur’s decision and once again promised He’d let him know when Bombur and his wife finally arrived.

Sighing, Sada contemplated searching out her Uncle, but then decided against it and continued on her lonesome tour.

She came to the small gallery, showcasing Dain’s direct bloodline, stopping before a grand portrait, more than likely Dain’s father, and Sada had only admired it for a few moments when a voice behind her said:

“He really wasn’t that intimidating in real life! Actually he was a kind sort of dwarf.”

Sada smirked and looked down the corridor where the male dwarf stood; his arms behind his back, dressed in fine clothing, he offered a faint smile as he approached.

“Lord Ezrin,” Sada greeted softly, offering a bow. “I was told you arrived yesterday.”

Ezrin chuckled, admired the portrait of the renowned dwarf, and then back to Sada as he explained:

“Yes I did. Oh! But it’s not ‘lord’ it’s just plain and simple Ezrin…though I don’t mind being referred to as a lord…makes me sound important!”

Sada offered her own soft smile; He was trying to make her laugh, She could read it in his large, soft brown eyes. 

Taking a moment as she thought, Sada at last apologized and replied: “I’m sorry we have to meet with such sad events taking place, truly, I am. I’m sure you would have preferred a much more…happier time.”

Ezrin nodded at first before bringing his arms to his front and crossing them across his chest. 

“I’m sorry about your mother,” He offered, “Nola was a very good woman. I wish I’d known her better.”

Sada, a wave of grief sweeping through her, averted her eyes to the portrait and struggled to maintain her composure.

“Da-father-He says you’ve done very well for yourself in Dunland,” Sada choked out while Ezrin shifted uncomfortably, “That you’re renowned for you skill as a leather worker.”

Ezrin, obviously grateful for the change in subject, nodded and followed Sada’s gaze to the portrait. 

“My father taught me,” He explained, “Ever since our days back in Erebor. I live in a village mainly populated by man…I think that helps my popularity. If I were in Ered Luin…I rather think I’d be considered mediocre at best.”

Sada chuckled, forcefully, and dared to look at the dwarf from the corner of her eye; He was very handsome. 

Ezrin was one with an olive complexion and long, dark curly hair, and an athletic physique; A very handsome dwarf indeed.

He was older of course, as her mother had explained to her before their departure, just a few years younger than what her late uncle Frerin would have been had he survived the battle of Moria.

“So…you were…like a little brother then? To my father I mean?”

Ezrin nodded and looked at Sada then, blinking his long eye lashes, he shrugged and replied: “I was friends with Frerin first…I met Thorin later and he took a brotherly liking to me…just as his father did with mine. We’ve always maintained contact and, I don’t know if you remember, I was at your-uh-their wedding.”

Sada shook her head; The only time she could recall meeting Ezrin was one winter long ago, when she was just about five-years-old. He was as pleasant then as he was now.

Sada found her self thinking of Nori, while Ezrin continued chatting, and she couldn’t help but feel an odd sense of guilt faintly overcome her when she found she enjoyed how Ezrin’s soft eyes remained transfixed upon her.

“Sada! What are you doing here? Where’s Dain? Why haven’t you an escort?”

Ezrin startled while Sada fought her urge to reply sarcastically and she turned slowly.

Thorin looked very much unlike his usual self.

She instantly noticed the red and swollen eyes shadowed by dark circles beneath them. His hair was tangle and greasy and his clothes were wrinkled and torn in some spots.

There was no telling how much sleep, if any, her father had gotten and with that in mind Sada knew she had to choose her words carefully.

“Please, My lord,” Ezrin suddenly interjected, “I saw her here and decided to make my appearance…it’s my fault entirely.”

Thorin blinked and, with great sadness, Sada could tell her father had completely forgotten about Ezrin and what the initial reason had been for his small family to travel to the Iron Hills.

“Forgive me father,” Sada offered herself, “I was…just waiting is all and got lost in conversation.”

“Hmph!” Thorin grunted as he straightened his back, “Go get your little brother…and meet me in Dain’s study in one hour. Go!”

Sada quickly bid her farewell to Ezrin and hurried past him before the dwarf had a chance to say anything to her in return.

As she turned a corner Sada heard her father remark to Ezrin: “Forgive her…she’s a bit odd.”


	4. Chapter Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sada and Thrain meet with Thorin for a moment.

Thrain had bounded from his bed and sprinted to the study almost the instant when Sada had roused him and told him their father had come.  


His trained stoic resolve gave away completely and by the time they’d come into the study, finding their father seated in a large chair, tears were gushing from the child’s eyes.

Thorin allowed Thrain to crawl into his lap, his arms circled the little dwarf protectively, but his eyes remained transfixed upon her.

“Are you both…how are you?” Thorin asked.

Thrain replied with a sniffle and whimper and Sada found she could only avert her eyes to the window to the left of where her father sat.

Rubbing Thrain’s back, Thorin slouched for a moment before straightening, and grunted his next question: 

“Your uncle…He’s taken care of things?”

“To the best of his ability, yes, I’m sure you can discuss things further with him…eh…will Fili and Kili come?”

Thorin nodded; “When Dain’s messenger found me…I sent him off to Ered Luin…they should arrive in a day or so.”

Sada said nothing more. Simply observing her father mutter words of comfort to his youngest child.

“You…you’re in need of sleep,” Sada dared to observe, “You look very warn Da-I mean-father.”

Thorin lifted his eyes from Thrain and stared oddly at Sada for a moment while he continued to let his son wet his tunic with his tears.

“It’s not necessary,” He explained, “I only ask that you call me father in the company of other’s. You may call me Daddy if it pleases you for now.”

A kind hand out, She knew his ways, and with that knowledge Sada knew something was coming. 

Something she knew she didn't want to have to acknowledge.

At the moment however, she was unsure as to what the matter was, it could be any number of things.

Her informal meeting with Ezrin, maybe, but Sada doubted Thorin really cared about that minor slip up at the present moment.

Was He displeased about how she’d handled Thrain for the past few days? He was always lecturing and advising her to be the best elder sister after all.

Or was it…the other matter that she hoped and prayed hadn’t reached her father’s ears just yet?

“When w-will we go home?” Thrain asked, his voice muffled as he pressed his face into Thorin’s shoulder, “I want to go home!”

“Soon,” Thorin sighed, “Very soon I promise, son, for now I need you to go and get your Uncle Bofur. I need to have a word with your sister.

What seemed to be like a block of ice settled in the pit of Sada’s stomach and she felt a very strong urge to sit as she watched her brother reluctantly take his leave.

“Come here,” Thorin ordered even before Sada had heard the heavy door thump shut; she hesitated and when she did not move her father smirked and extended his hand.  


“Come,” He repeated, “Please.”

She did so slowly and took her father’s very large hand and found it encased her very small one very gently and warmly.

“Daddy,” She started, “I am very sorry about~”

Her words caught in her throat when, to her utter surprise, Thorin pulled her into his lap.

She’d known some affection from Thorin from time to time, mostly in her younger days when she was not so displeasing to him. 

They had not sat like this for years! Not since she was a toddler and small enough to do so.

“You were just passing the time,” Thorin sighed, “and Ezrin is an honorable fellow and only thought to approach in that manner.”

She didn’t quite understand his words, but she dared not question them, for Sada didn’t want to do one single thing that would ruin such an odd but welcomed gesture from her usually officious father.

Smoothing her hair for a moment, taking in a shaky sigh, Thorin revealed: “They said you…saw some of it.”

Sada looked sharply at him then, her heart began to race, and she pressed her lips tightly when the memory assaulted her once more.

“What did you see?” Thorin asked in almost a whisper, “Please…it’s important.”

“Only wargs,” Sada answered looking away from him, “Big, stinking creatures! It happened all so fast…One minute we were galloping side by side b-but then Mama’s pony threw her and Thrain and…a-and she was hurt and they came so quickly Daddy I swear I~”

“Were there Orcs?”

Sada sniffled and looked down at her lap as she shook her head. “Only wargs…a pack of them was all I could see.”

Thorin’s free hand rubbed Sada’s back as he thought over her information before He pulled her close and kissed her cheek tenderly.

“I’m proud of you,” He admitted, much to Sada’s growing surprise.

“But…” She started, tears burning at her eyes, “Daddy…Th-there’s more…I-I mean I tried to…I was frightened and when Mama got hurt I~”

“Hush,” Thorin said, sternly but with tenderness, “I know what it’s like and I’ve been in dire situations like the one you were in more times than I care to remember. You were brave Sada! Carrying Thrain on your back all the way here with Wargs behind you…you acted the best and only way you could.”

Warm tears slid down her cheeks and she refused to meet her father’s gaze even when he asked her to do so.

“Sada,” Thorin said sweetly, using a hand to turn her eyes gently towards his own, “I need you to be strong now.”

“I know,” Sada whispered, “Everyone does.”

“Whatever you do,” Thorin advised then, “Do not dwell on it. Do not burden yourself with guilt over something that was completely out of your hands…it will destroy you.”

“Daddy…” Sada started to say, “it’s just that…when I got back to Mama and Thrain when the pony had tossed them I~”

“Sada,” Thorin sighed, now gently urging her from his lap, “What did I just say?”

“Very well,” Sada conceded softly just as the door to the study opened and her uncle, Bofur, appeared holding Thrain by the hand.

“Ye sent fer me?” Bofur asked, “So I’m here now.”

Thorin rose, ordered his children from the room, and when they’d gone he looked Bofur up and down and demanded: “Tell me all that you know.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things get more interesting in Chapter 5.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another Filler Chapter wherein Bofur and Thorin talk...as do Fili and Sada.
> 
> Next up: Three Years pass...and the story gets out of this slum I've created.

“I’ve sent word to everyone I can think of and they’ll be arrivin’ in the next two days or so in throes...Nola was quite loved after all.

I…thought it best to forego the usually tradition you Durin’s have and decided cremation was best. I assumed ye would want…to scatter her ashes in Ered Luin and besides that…”

Bofur shrugged and cupped his hand over his mouth as he yawned; “Besides tha’ I’ve just been keepin’ watch over Sada and Thrain.”

“How is Sada?” Thorin asked as he went to gaze out of the same window his daughter had only moments ago, “I’ve heard whispers.” 

Bofur’s brow wrinkled and he couldn’t help but chuckle; “Many whispers arise in times like these,” He pointed out, “Yer girl has been nothin’ but attentive to ‘er brother and when she isn’t, she was helpin’ me get things ready.”

When Thorin didn’t answer, Bofur mewled when he thought of it, and he shook his head.

“She aint been getting into any mischief with that Ezrin fellow! Like I told ye she’s been a good lass!”

“You misunderstand,” Thorin sighed, “at least I hope so and you are not just lying to me...deviating from the real reason I’ve called you here.”

“Bah!” Bofur spat, waving a hand, “Thorin…I’m too busy with more important matters to have me self distracted by your~”

“The guard,” Thorin interjected, “The messenger, I mean, He told me things. Things that worry me greatly…surely you have had heard these things.”

“Are we discussin’ things or whispers?” Bofur asked in a smarmy tone, “There’s a difference if ye think on it long enough!”

“They said,” Thorin replied in a venomous tone, “That she came screaming! Wailing that her mother had begged her to do it!”

Bofur’s eyes darkened and narrowed, finally realizing why Thorin had ordered him to the study, and he scowled in utter disgust.

“They said, the messenger explained to me, that Thrain was covered in blood…quarts of it by the look of his clothes. But there was no wound.”

“Nola…” Bofur had started, but suddenly looked away from the king as he thought, “She was injured when the pony threw her…it could have been her blood on the boy! Why’re ye doin’ this, Thorin?”

“His clothes were in tatters,” Thorin pointed out as he ignored Bofur’s question, “as if he’d been throttled and torn…have you ever seen someone in the jaws of a warg, Master Bofur?”

“No!” Bofur spat, “Nor do I care to know!”

Thorin shot him a piercing glance then, yet Bofur was unafraid, and he waited for the exiled king to either stop his grumbling or…

“The boy…seemed the clear loss,” Thorin sighed, looking away from Bofur, “But he lives where She does not…and without an examination of Nola’s body…we will never know will we?”

“Why are ye doin’ this?” Bofur demanded again, “I think ye need to lay down, rest a bit, because this is not the time to bring such things up! Yer wife-Me own sister-is dead…and all ye can do is…try an’ accuse the most innocent?”

“What if she is not innocent?’ Thorin asked, “What if…my fears…those whispers…are based in fact?”

“Then she did it under the order of ‘er Mama!” Bofur countered defensively, “any mother would make such a sacrifice!”

“How can we be sure?” Thorin pressed, and Bofur balked at his question, “Neither of us was there after all.”

“All I know,” Bofur explained as he turned to go, “Is that if what we both fear did in fact happen…it will haunt Sada fer the rest of ‘er life!”

Thorin said nothing as he watched Bofur place his hand upon the door, he didn’t voice his offense that the toy maker was taking his leave without his given consent.

But then, Bofur looked over his shoulder at Thorin, and he said so softly that the king barely heard it:

“Yer daughter-me niece-she’s not Orla! If ye have any warmth fer ‘er at all…I beg ye to question whether or not yer constant fear and suspicion could push her to the point Orla was at…just before she took ‘er own life.”

“I love my daughter!” Thorin confessed, “More than my own life!”

Bofur nodded curtly and said as he departed: “Then help her preserve her own.”

************************************************************************************************************************* 

The service had ended and most had departed yesterday evening, Bombur and his lot included, after a solemn banquet where not much conversation had taken place.

Thorin had receded into him self in the day’s prior and, only occasionally, offered a soft smile to the youngest of them all.

When Thrain wasn’t desperate for the comfort of his father, Uncle Bofur was his keeper and as of now Thrain was napping and Bofur, no doubt, had helped himself to the wine in Dain’s cellar.

Kili no doubt was admiring the armory, toying with the swords and bows while Fili, well meaning, was becoming rather annoying to Sada the moment.

As was his way, ever since she was born, He would not leave her side.

“I’m alright, Fili, really I am and I’m not an infant any more!”

Still Fili refused to let Sada from his sight and followed her into the gallery. Thorin had earlier bid him to keep an eye on her since, even now, other duties called his uncle away from his shrinking family.

He tried not to be embittered by his Uncle’s choice, but it was hard to ignore the feeling of anger that dwelled inside of him.

Like Thrain, Kili seemed much troubled, at the loss of Nola. In truth, His little brother had broke down like a toddler and wept heavily for hours when news had reached them of their aunt’s demise.

Fili couldn’t blame him! Nola had brought so much joy into their lives long after their mother had perished and in truth Kili had formed a bond with her over time. 

They needed Thorin but instead, and Fili huffed, He’d slunk away with Dain to discuss matters that “didn’t involve any of them at the moment.”

He didn’t care, really, what he needed to discuss with Dain. All Fili wished was that, just once; Thorin would act more like a father rather than a politician or exiled king!

“You should forgive him,” Sada said after a moment, “This is how he deals with…sad times.”

“Still,” Fili sighed with a smirk, “He should be more attentive to us! His kin…we’re…dwindling down.”

“He knows,” Sada pressed as she brought her gaze from a portrait of a fine looking dwarf woman, and observed Fili with a soft expression, “It frightens him and…I think he doesn’t wish for us to see him cry.”

“Thorin cry?” Fili asked with a chuckle, “I didn’t think he had the capability.”

“Anyone whom loves has that capability,” Sada countered with her voice cracking, “It’s my father that loves the most out of all of us Fili and you shouldn’t be so cruel!”

Fili sighed, draped an arm around Sada’s shoulders and apologized for his crass words. 

“You’re right,” He admitted, “I see what you mean…I just wish that he wouldn’t be so…Kingly sometimes.”

“It’s all he knows,” Sada explained with a chuckle, “It’s all that he is.” 

“Pardon me.”

Fili took his arm from Sada’s shoulders and they both turned to find Ezrin standing at the edge of the gallery, his hat removed and waiting to be invited to come forward.

When Fili had nodded, and Sada offered a quick curtsy, He did just that and offered both of them a bow of his own.

“I’ve come to say farewell,” He explained, “I’ve been away long enough and must get back to my shop.”

“But…” Sada started, looking at Fili whom offered her his own surprised expression, “We didn’t get to…discuss things.”

Ezrin inclined his head, a grin spreading across his handsome face, and he took Sada’s hand in his.

Fili stiffened, unsure of what Ezrin’s intentions, but said nothing when he noted that Sada seemed not to mind and showed no signs of offense.

Ezrin pressed his lips to Sada’s offered hand and when he looked at her he explained: “I would not dare to have you give me an answer at the moment. There are more important events transpiring of course. But…I do have one request?”  
“Ask it then,” Sada pressed softly, “So that I can grant it.”

“Shouldn’t the request go through Thorin?” Fili asked, his voice hard, “I mean…I know you’re a family friend and all but~”

“But Ezrin has been very kind and selfless,” Sada pointed out, “and father is busy at the moment.”

Fili grunted his disapproval yet allowed the conversation to continue without further argument.

“I would like very much, if you will, to maintain contact with you. Eh, letters and such, if it would be alright?”

Sada smiled, blushing slightly, yet nodded and said: “Of course, I would enjoy that Master Ezrin.”

Ezrin, blushing himself when he realized he still clasped Sada’s delicate hand, released it and bowed once more.

“I look forward to it…as well as future meetings,” He confessed, “Until then…My thoughts are with you-the both of you-farewell!”

“Well, he’s nice,” Fili said after Ezrin had taken his leave, “For now.”

“I’m aware of only one father in my life, Fili,” Sada said with a chuckled as she turned to peruse the gallery once more, “and Ezrin has always been nice.”

“What about Nori?” Fili asked suddenly, and Sada’s stared at him with her mouth agape and her eyes wide.

“I haven’t spoken to him in months,” Sada explained, “He left Ered Luin to live out another one of his schemes before we…before we came here.”

“But you still think on him,” Fili pointed out flatly, “That much is clear.” 

“It was infatuation,” Sada explained with a wave of her hand, “nothing more.”

“What will you do when Nori comes back?” Fili asked, looking over his shoulder to be sure they were not being overheard by anyone, “and He will, he always does, to check in on his brother’s. Keep in mind…we’re only allowed one love to fill our hearts. It would be cruel to…pretend to care for Ezrin if only to…ignore how you really feel...and Ezrin’s heart would be wasted.”

“I told you,” Sada spat as her anger rose, “I’m over him! Now, if you’ll excuse me, I think I could do with a nap.”

Without another word between the two cousins, Sada took her leave, and Fili’s gaze followed her until she was gone.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sada and Ezrin have become closethrough the years, through letters mainly, yet Thorin remains hopeful
> 
> On Thrain's first day out with 'the trio' Sada is reunited with an unexpected visitor.

“Daddy give it here! Please! Hand it over!”

He was considered quite tall amongst the dwarves, though shorter than men and elves, and so Thorin Oakenshield delighted using this fact to his own advantage and he couldn’t help but chuckle at his daughter’s comical jumping.

“Another letter from my dear old friend Ezrin, eh?” He teased his daughter as he dangled the letter over her head and out of her reach, “He writes you more now than he ever did me!”

“We have a lot in common!” Sada proclaimed in a huff after she jumped up again and missed the letter by a few inches, “Please give it! He said he’d tell me what happened with those horse thieves he helped collar last month!”

“Thieves?” Thorin asked, as he turned and laughed when his daughter attempted to climb on to his back, “How did he manage that?”

“He was asked by the local magistrate to help in preventing crimes! The dwarves in Dunland like him and trust him better than the men!” Sada declared as Thorin held the letter up once more and observed it thoughtfully.

“Daddy,” Sada panted, hands on her hips, “Please may I have it?”

“The two of you,” Thorin sighed thoughtfully, “Have become quite the pair of pen pals. Tell me, if you don’t mind, has he made mention of visiting us?”

Sada smiled as Thorin finally ended the torment and extended the letter; “He hopes to come,” She explained, “after the winter has passed and the roads aren’t as bad.”

Thorin smirked and watched as his daughter quickly opened the envelope and pulled the letter free. Though he thought of asking he’d decided against inquiring about whether or not any mention of marriage had been made by either of them.

It was obvious they were fond of each other, but truth be told, Thorin had no desire to rush his daughter into any decision that would take her from his protection at such a young age.

“Do be quick,” He advised as he watched Sada read Ezrin’s written words, “Thrain is quite excited about this afternoon.”

Sada nodded and mumbled: “Though we three are not.”

“Sada,” Thorin said cautiously, “He’s been looking forward to…being apart of the trio for sometime.”

“Yes Daddy, I know,” Sada sighed as she started on the next page of Ezrin’s letter, “He’ll be alright. I’ll watch over him like I always do.”

Thorin smiled softly and nodded just as he started to take his leave but, then suddenly, He stopped and said over his shoulder: “I’ll be in a meeting with Balin and the other’s after supper about…certain things. Will you make sure Thrain bathes?”

“Going to talk about Erebor?” Sada asked, looking up briefly, “In any case…yes I’ll be~”

A small squeak emitted from Sada’s mouth and her eyes widened, causing Thorin to turn and observe her with concern, and he asked calmly: “What happened? Bad news from Ezrin?”

“No!” Sada laughed, quite shrilly, “I-uh-got a chill is all…sorry.”

“Ah, I see,” Thorin replied as he started to leave once more, “Well…do be quick as Thrain is bouncing off the walls with excitement.”

 

 

“Thrain! THRAIN! Please wait up! There’s no rush! Daddy said he’d let you stay with us as long as we kept an eye out!”

“We should have gone by ourselves,” Sada heard Kili griping as they each struggled to walk across the fallen tree trunk, “He’ll ruin everything!”

“He will not!” Fili argued, “Sada’s already said she’ll watch while we…do our thing.”

“Oh yes,” Sada said as she finally reached solid ground, glimpsing Thrain in the distance, “I’m sure the baker’s daughter and her friend are waiting for the both of you somewhere in the woods, eh?

“You said you didn’t tell anyone!” Kili growled at Fili, “If Thorin finds out he’ll whoop us both!”

“Better that I do know,” Sada explained as Fili punched Kili hard in his shoulder, “That way I can work on a more feasible lie if I return home before either of you-THRAIN!?”

“So it still stands,” Fili asked from behind Sada, “We go our way and you’ll stay with Thrain?”

Sada nodded and waved the two of them away; “The bonfire will have til next week, as we agreed, go on then!”

“You told her about the bonfire?” Kili gasped, “Why does she have to have everything to do with us!”

“Hush and get moving!” Fili scolded as he shoved Kili onward, “Without her you and I would have no fun!”

 

 

Finding Thrain had been easy enough, She’d told him about the spot days before, but what Sada hadn’t expected was to see someone knelt down at Thrain’s side by the riverbed conversing with him so low that she couldn’t make out any words the two were saying to one another. 

She’d kept her blade sheathed, belted to her hip, the tips of her fingers touched the hilt as she approached. Her only instinct being to deliver her little brother from danger if need be, and the stranger looked toward her then.

Her back stiffened as the person rose and offered a friendly wave.

“Sada!” Thrain happily announced with a point of his little hand, “We found the fish! Nori and me!”


	7. Chapter Seven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nori's visits with both Sada and her uncle go quite unlike the way he'd hoped they would. *filler* chapter.

“There sure are lots! Do you think we could catch some?” Thrain asked, as he thrust his hands into the cool water in an attempt to catch one of the many fish that swam close to the service, “They’re slippery!”

“Thrain don’t get so close and mind your clothes!” Sada scolded as she came within inches of both of them, “You know Daddy will scold if you get dirty!”

“I Hope you don’t mind,” Nori offered as he rose and smiled at Sada, “I saw him playing about and I couldn’t let the son of Thorin Oakenshield go unattended by the river. How are you, love?”

Sada, fighting a whirlwind of emotions that varied in severe degree, smirked and muttered: “Perplexed. You’ve been gone sometime.” 

“Ugh! One splashed me in the eyes!” Thrain spat, wiping at his eyes, “I’ll show him!”

“He sounds a lot like his father,” Nori chuckled as he watched Thrain struggle to capture a fish, “If he keeps it up I imagine~”

“Where have you been?” Sada demanded, her tone soft and sociable, but her inherited eyes gleamed with anger.

“I-uh-was indisposed,” Nori confessed with a bashful shrug, “I meant to get back as soon as I could.”

“You were imprisoned you mean!” Sada hissed, making sure Thrain could not hear, “Have you any idea what’s been going on since you’ve been gone?”

Nori’s gaze darkened, he offered only a nod, and said nothing for a long moment.

“I’m so very sorry,” He offered at last when Sada moved to go to Thrain, “about your mother. I was very fond of Nola after all. Ezrin seems a nice enough fellow, I thought so, when I met him in Dunland.”

Sada sighed, ignored the urge to defend her self, and said: “I know you are...sorry about Mama, I mean. You grew up with Her and my uncles. I imagine you’ll be off to your brother’s for now?”

“Well…I wanted to chat with you first,” Nori confessed as Sada stepped around him and to kneel down next to Thrain, “I’ve thought of you often!”

“Don’t be so hasty,” Sada instructed the dwarrow, “Be patient." 

When Nori came to stand over the two siblings, Sada took a calming breath, and explained: "Things have much changed since you’ve been gone Master Nori and, as it is, you can very well see that I’m busy with my brother!”

“I can see that,” Nori admitted, his tone impatient as he recognized Sada’s passive rudeness, “When then? I will be in Ered Luin for sometime.”

“I will let you know, if I desire it,” Sada said with a false chuckle when Thrain once again missed a fishes writhing tail, “Good day to you sir.”

“Sada,” Nori started, but upon seeing the look the young woman cast up at him, the elder dwarf’s shoulder’s drooped and He slowly took his leave.  
************************************************************************************************************************* “Will ye stay fer supper then, Nori? We’d be glad to ‘ave ye!”

Nori nodded after Bofur ended the embrace and invited him into their small home where he was offered another friendly greeting from Bombur and his wife Sela. 

Bifur however uttered a low growl and, when he’d made to approach Nori, Bofur quickly said something to his cousin quite staunchly and the latter dwarf came to an uneasy pause as he continued to glower at Nori.

“Of course,” Nori agreed as Sela stepped forward and took his cloak, “Do we have time to smoke?”

Bofur nodded and gestured to the door that led to the back yard of their home; “We’d only be in the way fer now and both Bombur and Sela need…as much room as we can give them.”

“I heard that!” Bombur called from the kitchen, “and I know which herbs are poisonous!”

“Ah! Blow it outta your great arse, brother!” Bofur snapped back, “and hurry it up as I’m starvin’!”

Outside, Bofur wasted no time in lighting his pipe, yet Nori paced nervously beside him and after a moment dared to ask: “How’s Sada been keeping?”

Bofur studied his long time friend through a vale of thick smoke, his eyes hard, yet he answered softly: “As well as can be expected. She’s been writing to a gent in Dunland. A nice fellow by the name of~”

“Ezrin,” Nori interrupted, “I met him briefly.”

“’ave ye, now?” Bofur asked as he puffed on his pipe, “When did you-oh-I take it the meeting wasn’t a friendly one? He is after all a deputy.”

“He was actually more cordial than the usual lot,” Nori pointed out, trying to make light of the uncomfortable situation.

“So…are they…you know?”

Bofur snorted and choked on smoke; gagging and trying to talk before Nori urged him to take his time.

“’s not fer me to say,” Bofur coughed, “nor is it any o’ yer business!”

“Well…She just seems different is all,” Nori said defensively, “I was concerned that this fellow wasn’t being good to her.”

“They’ve just been writin’ one another,” Bofur chuckled as he patted his chest with a free hand, “No harm done near as I can tell but…I’d watch me self if I were you!”

“What’s the supposed to mean?” Nori asked, shocked that Bofur was giving him such an ominous warning.

“Sada has changed,” Bofur explained daring another puff from his pipe, “Watchin’ yer beloved mother die will do that to ye and, to be honest, Thorin an’ she have gotten quite close and I'd hate to see that ruined because yer still quite the womanizer!”

“Thanks a lot!” Nori snorted, “You really think I’d do Sada any harm?”

Bofur eyed Nori up and down for a moment before saying: “I don’t think you would intentionally, no.”

“So what’s the problem?” Nori demanded.

“Like I've been tellin' ye! Sada’s changed,” Bofur snapped, “and She’s changing still!”


	8. Chapter Eight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fili and Sada are discussing secretive things and making promises...when Thorin drops in.

“Drying flowers again?”

The question stilled Sada’s hand and she looked over her shoulder her cousin and smirked after watching him stare at the dried, dead flowers laid side by side on the small table next to the open doorway. 

“Um…yes, but to be honest, they aren’t what I’m really looking for as far as decorum is concerned I’m afraid. How are you, Fili?”

Fili shrugged and strolled over to where his cousin sat just as she penned the last sentence in her journal and rose from her chair.

“I saw Nori today, while I was out with Thorin,” The older of the two confessed, and Sada sighed and rolled her eyes.

“He indicated that you were just as displeased with seeing him the other day,” Fili replied with a smirk of his own, “But he asked me to give you this regardless.”

Sada eyed the folded message for a long moment before delicately taking it from her cousin’s hand.

“I’ve other things,” She sighed, “More important things to attend to than he!”

“Would that include taking care of yourself?” Fili inquired, catching Sada quite off guard, and he grinned at the sight of her surprised expression.

“I’m quite alright!” She insisted with a wave of her hand, “I only meant that I’m constantly watching over either Thrain or Bifur when Uncle Bofur can’t! Then there’s my lessons and all…it’s quite taxing!”

“Of course it is,” Fili agreed with a snort, “Eh, especially when you’re not sleeping, and…talking late into the night.”

Sada’s eyes widened and she turned away from Fili who clasped his cousin’s shoulders tenderly; “Don’t tell Daddy!” Sada pleaded, “It was only once…just once and I told her to go away! I-I’ve been telling her to go away!”

“You don’t have to explain anything to me,” Fili reassured Sada, “and I won’t tell Thorin…if you make me a promise?”

Sada, with some urging from Fili, turned and met his concerned gaze. 

“What promise is that?” She asked with a dry chuckle, “You know I’ll do whatever I can to uphold it.”

“Stop saying your drying those,” Fili instructed as he jutted his thumb over his shoulder, “and stop…doing what it is you’re really doing. Thorin’s becoming curious as to why you’ve yet to present any wreaths and all.”

“It’s just…mild curiosity,” Sada explained with a weak shrug, “It’s just like Orla wrote…I can give of my self…or take from another source and…bless another living object.”

“Yes,” Fili replied, “Don’t you remember I read those passages with you? If you’re not careful…one of two things could happen to you and I’d rather you just stopped now!”

“It’s just for sport,” Sada argued again with a wave of her hand, “There’s no need to worry Fili I’m quite capable~”

Fili caught Sada’s hand and looked at her desperately then; “Promise!” He demanded, “Promise or I’ll tell Uncle what you’ve been up to!”

“I’m quite aware of what she’s been up to,” Said a deep, even toned voice behind the two young dwarves.

“Daddy,” Sada started as Fili released her, and spun around to stare wide eyed at his calm and quiet Uncle and King.

“Fili,” Thorin said softly, “I believe you will find Kili and Thrain practicing their archery-outside-do go and watch over them will you?”

“Y-yes-Uncle-as you wish!” Fili answered just before casting a worried looked to Sada over his shoulder, “I’ll see you later.”

When Fili had gone, closing the door behind him, Thorin turned and observed Sada in the way that she hated.

His face was stone and his eyes were veiled; She couldn’t tell what he was thinking nor could she even guess why he’d come.

All She knew, what Sada had learned through the years with previous tense encounters, was that her father was greatly displeased and searching for the right words to speak to her. 

As well as fight off his growing, quite frightening, temper.

“Sit,” Thorin ordered, pointing to Sada’s chair behind her, “We’ve much to discuss.”


	9. Chapter Nine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sada can't sleep due to an uninvited visitor.

“Daddy I promise I didn’t mean to make you angry…it was only curiosity and nothing more I swear!”

“Curiosity can lead to danger,” Thorin countered calmly coming within inches of where his daughter sat, “I’ve told you that many times.”

Sada’s heart was pounding and her mind was immersed in a blizzard of differing thoughts; there was no way he could truly know what she’d been doing!

She’s been careful, after all, conducting her small experiments late at night when she knew her father slept.

How could he have known? She didn’t even dare to write about it in her journal given Thrain found it, whenever it pleased him to do so, and read the passages.

Suddenly Thorin leaned over, Sada tensed, and then began to slowly relax as her father reached behind her and took up the folded note Fili had just presented to her moments ago.

“This will not do,” Thorin sighed, beginning to tear the note up, “He’s not good enough for you…and it’s disrespectful to Ezrin. Wouldn’t you agree?”

Feeling as though she would cry in relief, Sada only nodded for a moment, then mumbled: “I…I should’ve rejected the letter…I don’t know why I accepted it. He can’t ever stay out of trouble any ways…a waste of my time.”

Thorin smirked and crumpled the bits of parchment into his large fist, smoothed Sada’s dark hair with his free hand, and bent to place a kiss atop her head.

“Very good,” He sniffed, “You should take your afternoon nap now…you don’t seem to be sleeping well as of late.”

*********************************************************************************************************************

She’d only lain down when the chilliness set upon her.

“Oh,” Sada sighed, “Do please just go away!”

The cold increased, a weight bore down beside her on the bed, and without opening her eyes Sada rolled over and sighed.

“I’m trying to sleep,” Sada explained, “I don’t want to hear it any how! Daddy and I have been getting along great and I think it's in part to the fact I don’t talk to your type any more!”

Like always She could hear the visitor whispering, the room was like ice, and Sada still tried shut out the soft yet desperate words.

“I do!” Sada snapped through gritted teeth as she began to shiver, “Please go away!”

Tears burned at her eyes now and Sada whimpered as she curled into as tight a ball as she could; “Mama,” She stammered, “Please go away!”

Suddenly Sada uncurled, shot straight up on her elbows and spat: “I was wrong! I thought that you would only perish because a wargs! I didn’t know that I would be a part of your death!”

Nola was clothed in the same light dress she’d been wearing the day she’d been ushered to Manos, minus any signs of a violent demise, sighed heavily and extended her hand. 

“Don’t!” Sada snapped, as she crawled off the bed, “and just-go-AWAY!”

With that Sada hurried from the room, angry tears in her eyes, and for a moment she stood trembling in the corridor.

Her mother had been visiting her quite frequently these days, mostly at night, and begging her for her unique audience.

It was, of course the reason dark circles had begun to appear beneath the young dwarf’s eyes.

With a great shudder, Sada decided to forgo her attempt at a quick nap, and opted instead to take a long walk far away from the living and the dead.


	10. Chapter Ten

She knew she would have to put up with another one of her father’s speeches about how it was considered odd that a young, unwed female strolled about the market place with no intention of purchasing any goods.

At this point, Sada gave little care, staring back just as hard at other’s whom did the same until they looked away and she offered loud laughter when she noticed other’s begin to whisper as she past.

She wondered if they ever thought of how much more luckier they were, than her, to be rid of the responsibilities brought unto her shoulders simply because she had been born.

“Ah! Miss Sada! I’m glad to see you as I’ve a lovely new display!”

Sada swallowed her moan, turned and offered a false smile, and replied: “I’m only walking…I’ve no intent of buying anything sir!”

“At least take a look, just in case,” Pleaded the elderly merchant, “you might want something later!”

Sada smirked, yet approached, and surveyed the accessories laid out before her.

“A nice display,” Someone commented as He came to stand beside Sada, “You’ve always had quite a talent for jewelry making!”

The merchant narrowed his eyes at Nori whom offered quite a false smile, and said to Sada: “Perhaps next time then? Do please give my best to your father.”

“Sir,” Sada answered with a nod of her head and departed, secretly excited just like she used to feel when he’d come, and Nori hurried after her.

“I take it you’ve pinched some items from him a time or two,” Sada observed as Nori struggled to keep up with her through the bustling crowd, “He really didn’t like seeing you!”

“That was a while ago!” Nori laughed, “and besides, Dwalin made me give it all back, after I got out of the jail!”

“Oh ha ha!” Sada said sarcastically, “I’d rather be alone right now, Nori, good day!”

“I can’t allow that!” Nori pointed out, much to Sada’s annoyance, “Your Uncle would never forgive me if I let you wander around unescorted!”

“I…I’m going to my Uncles,” Sada lied, “and I don’t think he’d like seeing you with me given all that’s happened in the past!”

“If you were going to visit Bofur,” Nori contested as He put himself in front of Sada to make her stop, “You’d be going that way!”

“Nori,” Sada moaned, “I just want to take a walk!”

“All I want is to talk,” Nori explained gently, “Please…didn’t you get my message?”

“My father did,” Sada explained with a shrug, and Nori’s eyes widened.

“You mean…” Nori started, looking over his shoulder, “Your father…your big, short tempered father…read my message?”

Sada couldn’t help but chuckle as she stepped around Nori and continued on her way, Nori was still undeterred, and followed her.

“He didn’t,” Sada confessed as she pulled her arm from Nori’s grasp, “But he tore it up before I could read it so you’ve nothing to fear and, besides, he’d more than likely send Dwalin after you if he really meant to scare you…or worse.”

“Ha ha!” Nori said as he put himself in front of Sada, who was becoming quite annoyed with his interference, “Please…I just want to talk to you!”

“Why?” Sada snapped, “You made your self…what I meant to you…perfectly clear quite some time ago!”

“You think I wanted to?” Nori asked, “Sada…you were so young and-and both Bofur and…your mother, they just wanted what was best for you.”

“And you didn’t think you were what was best for me, right?” Sada asked in a snotty tone as she began to inspect her fingernails, “You agreed with them?”

“Yes,” Nori answered softly and plainly, much to Sada’s subtle shock, “But…but I just had…I wanted to see you again!”

“I’m fine,” Sada protested, placing her hands on her hips, “and I will be better once I get on with my walk!”

“You’d do better taking a nap,” Nori pointed out as he tenderly took Sada’s chin in his hand, “You’re not sleeping well are you?”

“Nori,” Sada sighed as she took a step back, “I get enough advise, of that sort, from my father.”

“But you can tell me what it is that keeps you awake,” Nori pointed out, “Without fear of me becoming angry and judgmental. You’ve always been able to freely talk to me. Can’t I please walk with you? You might be able to get a good nights sleep after you get home!”

Sada sighed, looked at her feet, and then slowly brought her gaze back to Nori. 

She couldn’t deny that she hadn’t thought of Nori, often as she still did, when he’d been away for so long. 

Nor could she deny that what was happening was tearing her apart on the inside.

“Very well,” She conceded with a yawn, “But don’t think this means I still think about you like some love struck child!”

Even knowing how well Nori could read others, Sada hoped, that he would see past such an obvious lie.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Really corny and melodramatic chapter but I find I'm dragging this 'book' on...things are about to pick up though.

She was admittedly touched that Nori chose their usual spot, far from prying eyes, escorting her to the thicket of trees where they’d often met in secret a few years ago.

“Sit,” Nori invited, as he sat and drew his knees to his chest, “I think we’ve plenty of time before you have to go.”

“I know,” Sada explained with a huff as she sat, folding her skirt under her knees as she came to rest on them, “Though I will have to endure another one of my father’s lectures.”

They chatted about many things, even Ezrin, though Nori seemed to change the subject quickly while Sada suddenly felt the urge, and followed it, to be closer to the dwarf with every kind smile and deep stare he offered her.

“Would you look at that,” Sada observed as she looked up, “The stars are visible…not only will I be lectured…Daddy will deliver it while screaming and red faced!”

“Don’t worry,” Nori laughed, “As sweet a daughter as you’ve always been he’ll forgive you!”

“Not likely,” Sada confessed, “I mean…we’ve been getting on well enough…but some of it has to do with certain deceptions.”

Nori inclined his head; “Dreams?” He asked, “Is that it?” and Sada shook her head as she looked into the late evening sky.

“Believe it or not…I’ve dreamed of nothing,” Sada explained, “a few months ago I dreamed of being under water…and screams…but I know when dreams are more than what they’re meant to be and the only water I’m around is my bath water. It’s the…the other thing, Nori, that’s bothering me.”

“You mean what happened in the Iron Hills?” Nori asked, and Sada averted her gaze and began smoothing the wrinkles in her skirt.

“Oh…not just that,” Sada explained in almost a whisper, “I mean…the other thing.”

“Oh!” Nori said with a nod, “You mean…someone is wanting an audience with only you? And usually when you’re trying to sleep, correct?”

Throwing a handful a grass, watching the wind carry the blades away, Sada explained in a flat tone: 

“Orla wrote that, for some reason, the spirits were more easily able to converse with her when all was quiet…when she was peacefully resting and without any earthly disturbances.”

“Did she…write how she could make them go away permanently?” Nori asked as he plucked his own blade of grass and placed it between his lips, “I mean, surely, it bothered her at times as well.”

“Oh no!” Sada laughed as she waved a hand at Nori, “Orla was intent on taking an audience with any and every damn spirit that decided to come and see her…she was mad after all!”

“But you’re not,” Nori pointed out, “Just sleepy…and cranky!”

“Yes I am,” Sada replied as she leaned forward, staring off into the distance and listening to the nearby river.

“So lay your head on my chest and get some rest,” Nori offered, and Sada looked at him with a baffled expression.

“You said your self that Thorin’s going to give you an earful when you get back, at least you can tell him the reason you were late was because you finally got some sleep!”

“No Nori,” Sada offered very gently, “I meant that I know I’m mad. I…I’ve known it ever since the Iron Hills!”

“Sweetheart,” Nori started as he sat back up again, “That was a horrid thing that happened…it would wound any one!”

“Me more so than others I think,” Sada admitted with a laugh as she then began picking blades of grass again; “Poor Thrain started to wet his bed. After we got back I mean…it took Daddy sitting up with him at night to finally help him to stop.”

“It wound’s you,” Nori offered once more, “He was so young…can’t imagine how it would have affected me if I saw my loved one…being stolen away from me in the manner that Nola was.”

“He didn’t,” Sada explained, “He started the behavior when…after he heard the rumors He became afraid of me. Daddy sat with him so he'd know someone was keeping me away while he slept.”

Nori stretched out his legs and lay upon his elbows, studying how still and sad the female dwarf had become after she uttered such a heart wrenching revelation to him.

“Sada,” He started, “Those were only rumors and Thrain is a child…children become frightened at the silliest things.”

“They fear the truth especially,” Sada offered quickly as she rose, “They’re not rumors, the whispers you’ve heard, about how my mother died…But no body truly knows the truth.”

“Sada,” Nori started, his heart pounding and his stomach suddenly in knots, “Sit down.”

“Why?” Sada asked, tears filling her eyes, “I’m sure that’s what you wanted to know, right? That’s why you suddenly came back and why you so quickly wanted to meet with me, right?”

Nori sniffed, thought over his words, and just as tears slid down Sada’s cheeks He confessed: 

“Bofur…already suspects that’s what happened. You forget, Sada, He was very close to Nola and he knew her…perhaps far better than you think you knew her.”

“So he blames me, right?” Sada asked with a laugh, “Though he has every reason too.”

“He worries,” Nori explained quickly, “As I do. But only because he doesn’t-nor do I-want you to think that what you did was wrong!”

“How was it right?” Sada demanded, her voice cracking, “I…I could have very well let Thrain die!”

“But you didn’t,” Nori explained with a groan as he rose to his feet, “Because it wasn’t your choice.”

“Wasn’t it?” Sada asked as she sniffled and wiped her eyes with her thumb, “They were my hands…not Mama’s…”

“You can’t blame your self,” Nori pressed as he pulled Sada into his arms, “It was her choice, sweetness, She chose to die. I think the only regret Nola had was knowing it would hurt you this much. Maybe that’s why she’s coming to you.”

Sada lifted her head from Nori’s shoulder, looking deeply into his light blue eyes as she allowed him to wipe away the wetness from underneath her own.

“Oh, and I didn’t want to see you to get the truth,” the older dwarf added, “It appears that both of us are growing tired of putting on airs when clearly, we’re both in pain. I have missed you Sada!”

“How did you know?” Sada asked, cupping Nori’s hand for a moment, “How could either of you have possibly known?”

“I didn’t,” Nori confessed softly, “But Bofur was concerned…remember? She was his beloved sister. I just made an…educated guess.”

“How can you not be…disturbed by me?” Sada continued to question as Nori’s arms encircled her waist, “You’re the only one not to be…afraid of me…or fear for me like Uncle Bofur is.”

“Because of you I was able to make my mother smile,” Nori answer softly, “we’d been so at odds…and when she was on her death bed I thought I would never get the chance to make my peace…but you made sure that I got that chance.”

Sada, before she even thought twice, instantly kissed Nori whom returned the embrace.

For a long moment they stood, their kiss deepening, until Nori broke away with a satisfied chuckle.

“Does Ezrin ease your spirit so?” He inquired with an arched eyebrow, lifting Sada off her feet and twirling her about slowly.

“I’ve never kissed Ezrin,” Sada admitted when Nori set her down and she smoothed his braided beard with one hand gently, “and to be honest…I don’t think I ever plan too...because you and I left so much undone between us.”

“Such as?” Nori asked inclining his head.

Sada answered with a smile and gave him another deep kiss which Nori gladly took.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Set up chapter...things are about to get interesting.

“Daddy please! Ow! You’re hurting me!”

“Do you have any idea-ANY-how worried I was? I was about to send out a search party! You know you’re not to go out by yourself!”

“Oh will ye calm down!” Bofur spat, pushing him self between Thorin and Sada so that his niece’s father would release his vice like hands from Sada’s shoulders. 

“You can’t tell me you’re alright with her actions,” Thorin growled crossing his arms and tapping his foot, “It’s past midnight!”

“O’course I’m not alright with it!” Bofur argued, “But Sada knew ye would be angry with ‘er like I am! Tha’s why she came to get me so I could bring her home! She knew she’d need me to wrestle ye to the ground if the need arose! That, or she needed someone to account for her last known whereabouts, ye know…just in case!”

“Father,” Sada sighed softly as Thorin snorted impatiently at Bofur’s ill-timed jest, “I’m so sorry…truly I am…I just fell asleep I swear!”

“That doesn’t answer for your blatant disregard against my orders!” Thorin spat, “and you still left unescorted! And what in the world possessed you to…to take a nap in the woods?” 

“I…it just happened. I was so tired, even you said your self, that I haven’t been sleeping well.”

Thorin scoffed, threw his hands up, and looked at Bofur in disbelief. 

“Was her mother this hard to deal with when she was this age?” Thorin demanded in such a tone that Bofur tugged his short beard to keep from chuckling.

“Eh, actually,” Bofur confessed as he stuck his thumbs in his belt, “There was only one time that comes to me mind…but she was a bit older than Sada.”

“Oh!” Thorin barked as he waved his hand up at the toy maker, “If you’re not going to help then be quiet!”

“Thorin,” Bofur sighed with a smile, “It was an accident, not to mention, a rude mistake! I’m sure Sada is sorry fer worryin’ the both of us, aren’t ye lass?”

“I won’t ever, ever do it again!” Sada answered, “I swear! Can we please go home now?”

Thorin sighed, pinched his nose as he thought, then conceded at last: “Very well. But don’t think you’ve escaped a deserved punishment! You even ruined your dress!”

Sada looked down and observed the tears and grass stains that littered her once immaculate dress, and chuckled while she pulled a blade of grass from her long hair, yet the young dwarf could only look at her feet while she awaited Thorin’s order.

“Child,” Thorin chided, “Go wash up-wait for me in your room-while I speak to your uncle.”

When she’d gone, just as he closed the door, Thorin leaned his forehead against the cool wood and moaned: “She was with him!”

“Aye,” Bofur sighed, “Tha’s obvious enough! ‘I fell asleep in the woods’? Mahal! Tha’s the same lie Nori advised his past dalliances to tell their loved ones too! He needs to come up with something fresh!”

“Bofur,” Thorin said with a cringe, “That doesn’t help!”

“Oh,” Bofur said with a laugh, “She’s a smart lass! Much like ‘er mother!”

“I wish her mother was here,” Thorin confessed softly without looking at Bofur, “She’d listen to her!”  
*************************************************************************************************************************

“I’m surprised he didn’t flog you!”

“Shut up Kili!”

“Or take away your flute!”

“I-said-shut up!”

“Or make you scrub pots all night in the kitchen!”

Fili quickly stepped in between the two and caught Sada’s fist in mid air and, looking over his shoulder, spat: “Kili just be quiet! Work on your archery because your aim is still off!”

“No it isn’t!” Kili retorted as he began loading another arrow, “Even Thorin says I’m doing better!”

“I’m surprised He hasn’t told you the truth!” Fili spat back quickly as he escorted Sada away from his scowling younger brother.

Sada burst out laughing as Kili began to curse at Fili’s retaliatory jab, as she let her cousin guide her away from the archery range and her obnoxious cousin.

“So…what is he going to make you do?” Fili asked as he offered his arm to Sada, “Most I know is he took you into the study for a long time last night…surprised you came out!”

Sada looped her arms with her cousins and sighed; “Later in my bedroom, He just talked,” Sada explained while Fili waited for more details, “You know…about how even though we’re exiled I’m still a part of the Durin dynasty so I must act accordingly. Then he threatened that he’d have Nori thrown in the jail if I tried to see him again.”

“Ouch!” Fili observed, “Blackmail…good one!”

“Yes,” Sada agreed in an insolent tone, “good one! Even though He himself sneaked around with, married, and had a ‘wretched little bother’ with a common woman!”

“Well,” Fili countered gently, “He is recognized as the rightful heir to Erebor after all… while Nori’s just another dwarf!”

“Who is smart and loving and charming…not at all what other’s think him to be!” Sada explained, “I mean…Ezrin is a bit boring…obsessed with his career it seems!”

“That explains why Thorin likes him so much,” Fili deduced with a crooked smile, “But…as far as Nori is concerned…didn’t you tell me that even Nola didn’t want you…risking your heart?”

“But it’s alright that Daddy wants me to throw it away on Ezrin, right?”

Fili shrugged and offered: “I think he just wants you to be alright…safe.”

“But unhappy!” Sada pointed out, much to Fili’s exasperation, “Beside Fili it’s just like I said it isn’t fair and-NO!”

“OW!” Fili yelped, “Sada your finger nails are cutting right through my sleeve! What are you doing?!”

“Fili,” Sada started as tears welled in her eyes, “W-will you take me to my Uncles?”

“What?” Fili asked, “We’ve got errands! And I’m sure you don’t want to anger Thorin any more than you already have!”

“Just for a moment!” Sada pleaded, pulling her arm free and starting off on her own, “I…there’s something I need to do!”


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bofur isn't trying to be an a** Hole...believe it or not he is trying to help.

“Oh, I never mind a visit! Especially not from you or Fili! Now sit, I know you’ve not long to stay, but still sit!”

Fili bowed courteously and said: “I’ll stand because, as you observed, we can’t possibly stay long…right Sada?”

Sada sighed, looked at Fili, and then turned her desperate gaze to her uncle; Bofur, well acquainted with odd stares and what they truly meant, smirked and offered a rare and false chuckle.

“Aye…ye’ve displeased yer Daddy at the moment an’ it won’t do fer you to cause him to spout off at you again.”

“But,” Sada began, “Uncle Bofur I just needed to~”

Bofur held up a hand and explained: “So, Fili, whatever ye need to do please feel free to take yer leave…if anythin’ I’ll bring Sada back home.”

Relief settled upon Sada and she slumped in the chair, while Fili shifted on his feet, and observed her hesitantly.

“Either way,” He warned with a deep exhale, “Thorin’s going to give you an earful when you get home!”

“Bah!” Bofur chided with a wave of his hand, “Ye escorted ‘er here and I’ll escort her home! Either way…she’s obeying Thorin’s rules! Well…she’s bending them…but not breaking them and he’ll be able to discern between the two.”

Fili couldn’t help but chuckle, grateful as he always was, for the toy maker’s endless wit, and happily took his leave.

“A fine boy, he is,” Bofur observed softly as he went about stuffing his pipe with tobacco, “Not at all as…serious as yer Daddy, more like his father, nor as brash as his Kili!”

 

“You recall Fili’s father?” Sada inquired, “He him self can barely remember what he looks like!”

Lighting his pipe, thinking a moment, Bofur shrugged and said: “He was a dwarf of good repute…high status, funny, and even Thorin liked him! Which is why I think he gave Dis is permission to wed him.”

“I doubt I will have such an easy time marrying the one I desire,” Sada replied with quick smirk, “Even if it is Ezrin…I can tell he’s still…uneasy with it all irregardless of whom I desire.”

“I thought it would be Ezrin,” Bofur confessed through an exhale of strong smelling smoke, “I mean…ye do seem fond of him enough.”

“Oh Uncle,” Sada said with a moan, “He’s kind enough…charming and all, but honestly, I really just feel a sisterly connection with him.”

“What ye say doesn’t match yer…it doesn’t make sense,” Bofur pointed out as he took another puff from his pipe, “Are ye saying that ye ‘ave…been putting on an act?”

“It’s been…things have been better,” Sada answered softly, averting her eyes when she noticed the disappointed gaze Bofur cast at her.

“Oh lass,” Bofur sighed as he at last came and sat in the adjacent chair, “I can understand that…yer father can be difficult and a bit more judgmental than is necessary but…what if Ezrin isn’t putting on an act?” 

“I’ve thought about that,” Sada pointed out as she crossed her arms and slouched further, “But…He hasn’t really written anything that would make me worry that I’m…that He could get offended.”

“Perhaps he’s waiting,” Bofur explained in such a flat and cold tone that Sada’s eyes widened, “Or He hasn’t yet decided what exactly to write! Believe it or not some males are just as concerned fer their own hearts as any female can be!”

“Uncle,” Sada started, but grew still and silent when Bofur rose quickly and headed over to the unlit fireplace.

“I’ve…I’ve kept as quiet as I thought was necessary,” Bofur sighed as he tapped out the still smoking tobacco from his pipe, “But at this point…yer not only bein’ foolish…yer being cruel Sada!”

“But,” Sada began as she her self rose from her chair; “This isn’t why I came by Bofur!”

“Oh I know why ye came by!” Bofur snapped uncharacteristically, “and I won’t help ye! I’m sorry sweetness but…I’ve gotta agree with yer father! I’m not gonna help ye in yer situation with Nori!”

Sada’s eyes widened Her emotions a flurry of hurt, anger, and shock yet she only bow her head before shaking it slowly.

“That’s not why I came…I…I got scared and didn’t want to go home right away.”

“What did ye do now?” Bofur asked, clearing his throat, and leaning his temple against his fist.

“I haven’t done anything!” Sada spat, “I saw her in the market place when Fili was taking me to help with his errands!”

Bofur jerked, looking his oldest niece up and down, and he squinted as he thought over his next question. 

Wondering if He really wanted to know the girls answer.

“I just needed to come here,” Sada explained as she twisted her hands, “…I don’t know why…but lately…I don’t know…she’s becoming so persistent.”

“Sada,” Bofur warned, waving a single finger at her, “Don’t.”

“I…I know I said-I lied-and said that nothing has been going on but ever since Ezrin started writing me more and ever since Nori got back, Uncle Bofur, She came back.”

“SADA!” Bofur bellowed suddenly and slammed his fist down so hard upon the fireplace mantel that the wood split down the center, “I-said-don’t…what yer sayin’…it’s disrespectful and-Bofur’s voice cracked and he covered his mouth and took a deep breath-it’s painful.”

“I know it is!” Sada still argued defiantly, “Don’t you think I know that?”

“Then ye should just…leave well enough alone!” Bofur pointed out, poking his finger at Sada to emphasize his meaning, “I won’t hear this Sada!”

“But Uncle Bofur!” Sada whimpered suddenly, tears welling in her eyes, “I was hoping you’d be able to help!”

“I am not about to believe, for one bloody second, that yer mother came back from the dead if only to help ye fulfill yer foolish puppy dog desires!”

Sada jerked, her mouth dropped, and tears flowed freely down her cheeks.

“Wh-what?” She stammered, “What did you just say?”

“Sada,” Bofur moaned, “I love ye darlin’…truly I do! But this whole mess with Nori…now yer draggin’ yer blessed mother into it? Ye just ‘ave to accept that Thorin-and me self-are going to do whatever we can to make sure ye don’t waste yer time!”

“You,” Sada gasped shrilly, “You think I’m here to try and coerce you into helping me get Daddy to give me permission to see Nori? You, of all dwarves, think that I’m so low that I would drag my dead mother into it?”

Bofur took a very deep breath, held both his hands up in a gesture to obtain a new peaceful moment, and stated softly: “I just think…I think yer leadin’ a bit to much with yer heart. Maybe even yer imagination.”

Sada, tears still streaking her face, began to shake her head very slowly. As if she was having trouble absorbing all that her most beloved uncle had just declared.

“I can’t believe you…” She finally sobbed, and she backed away when Bofur made to approach her, “I thought I could always talk to you!”

“And ye still can baby!” Bofur protested, “I just…yer goin’ through a lot lately and I know ye still miss yer mother-we all do-but Nori can’t fix it!”

Sada scoffed, her face a horrible mask of humiliation and utter despair, and she slapped Bofur’s hands away when he’d come close enough to her to hug her close.

“Sada!” Bofur started just as Sada turned and jerked the door open, “It’s alright!”

“You leave me alone!” Sada bellowed through choking sobs, “You’re just like the rest!”

Even amidst his protests, Sada hurried from her Uncles home and ran blindly into the streets of Ered Luin.


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After her troubling days Sada seeks comfort from an unlikely source only to be interrupted later in the night.

What anger, whatever lecture he had at first determined to give to her, faded immediately when she’d come into his study while he’d been reading.

“Sada,” Thorin started, but was startled into silence when he’d risen, and his eldest child threw herself into his arms.

“What’s wrong?” He asked, “Did some one hurt you?”

Sada sniffled and shook her head, relaxing a little as her father stroked her hair, for a few brief minutes as she rested her cheek against his firm shoulder.

“I’m tired,” She mumbled, “I’m so very tired.”

“I imagine!” Thorin announced with a sigh, “You look terrible…and you’ve been crying. Let’s get you to your room where you can rest.”

“I don’t want to be alone!” Sada protested, “Can’t I stay with you?”

“Sada,” Thorin sighed, “I’m becoming very worried about you.”

Sada said nothing to this, She only clung to him, refusing to ease her grip.

“Come,” Thorin offered at last, “Sit with me.”

Instead, as He chuckled in surprise, when Thorin seated himself He was forced to resituate him self as Sada curled into his lap; Her ear pressed to his chest as listened to his heart beat.

“You were like this when you were a baby,” He confessed, “No matter the hour, you’d wake, crawl into bed with your mother and me, and you always slept this way between us.”

“I felt safe,” Sada explained with a sniffle, “After I’d crawl into the bed...when I had a nightmare. It helped me sleep.”

“Sada,” Thorin sighed, “Not that I mind this…show of sentiment, I have to ask, don’t you think you’re getting too old for this?”

“I just want to rest a moment,” Sada answered softly, “I just really want to sleep is all.”

Thorin sighed again, caressed Sada’s hair, and conceded: “Very well, though supper will be soon, you’ll have to get up then.”

“Alright,” Sada agreed with a yawn, “That’s fine.”

********************************************************************************************************************

The candles had burned to nothing and they were clothed in the dark presence of night.

Sada deduced that the servants, possibly even Fili, had left them to sleep well past suppertime.

Sitting up, cautiously so as to not disturb her father, Sada looked about for a moment, and sighed in frustration.

“You are persistent, aren’t you, even now?” She asked in a whisper, “I’d think you’d leave us considering these moments are the kind you always hoped we have.”

Thorin stirred, grumbled something unintelligible before becoming still and quiet once more.

“If he wakes up…you know what will happen!” Sada whispered shrilly, “Go away!”

“Just a moment you silly child,” Nola argued softly with no anger in her tone, “I must press upon ye how important it is that ye don’t continue with this game o’ yers! Ye mustn’t meet with Nori any more!”

Sada sighed, lay her head back upon her father’s chest, and closed her eyes. Listening to the strong, steady beat of Thorin’s heart and ignoring the lingering presence of the one whom only she could see.

“Please,” Nola pressed, “Ye must obey my- and yer father’s-wish…don’t pursue it any further.”

Sada took a deep breath, completely done with other’s telling her what to do, and she squeezed her eyes as tightly shut as she could.

Nola sighed from where she stood; “Very well,” Nola conceded as Her voice grew distant, “I pray that fate is kind to ye.”

When she’d felt her mother dissipate, Sada slowly opened her eyes, and carefully sat up so as to not wake Thorin from his slumber.

“Coming from another realm just to lecture me like the rest?” Sada asked sadly, “I’ve never felt so invaded in my life!”

“Huh?” Thorin asked groggily, “Wassat?”

“Oh…nothing father,” Sada lied, “But I think they let us sleep past supper. If it’s alright with you I’m going to get to bed.”

“Yes…good idea…nighty-night.”

For the first time, it seemed, Sada smiled softly before she kissed her father’s cheek and took her leave knowing her father would prefer to be left undisturbed in his study.   
Ever since her mother’s death, he had never slept easy, and if wakened he wouldn’t be able to fall back asleep.

When she entered her bedroom, deciding not to change, Sada crawled onto her bed and curled into a ball as she thought.

In all honesty it didn’t matter what any of them had to say. It was her decision and, now that her own mother had tried to impede her own desire for happiness, Sada had finally made it.

She was done pretending. It was enough that she was pretending to have a more than platonic interest in Ezrin, done with pretending that she no longer dreamed and conversed with things that caused so many people to stare at her and whisper about her.

She was done lying to herself most of all. Seeing Nori had been what she needed to feel truly happy and at peace again.

With a deep sigh, Sada resigned herself, and eased herself by thinking about the secret fact that in a few days time she would see the one she truly loved once more at the agreed upon meeting place.


	15. Chapter Fifteen

“But Daddy said I had to stay with you!”

“You will it’s just…I think you’re big enough to be left to play on your own, don’t you think so?”

Thrain pouted, crossed his arms, and spat: “You’re up to something! That’s why you wanna leave me here!”

‘Clever boy,’ Sada thought as she knelt in front of her little brother, and she sighed as she thought over her words.

“Look…it’ll be just a little while and then I’ll be back, I promise!”

“You gonna go find Nori?” Thrain asked, and Sada could help but laugh, what a clever brother she had indeed!

“If you can keep it a secret,” Sada teased as she tapped Thrain’s nose, “Then yes…but just for a little while of course. You come first!”

“If I come first how come I can’t go with you?” Thrain asked curiously, then his eyes brightened with mischief and he asked, “You gonna kiss him?”

“Would such a thing be pleasing to watch?” Sada asked with a smirk and arched eyebrow, and she chuckled when Thrain grimaced.

“Gross!” He spat, “I’d rather try catching stinky fish again than watch that!”

“Well…no fish catching while I’m gone. Actually, avoid the river at all costs!” Sada ordered as she rose, “Keep to the woods, climb trees, and listen to the birds…no river until I get back. Do you promise me?”

Thrain kicked a small stone with his foot, pouted, but nonetheless muttered: “Fine, I promise!”  
************************************************************************************************************************

“It’s beautiful Nori! Thank you so much!”

When Nori had finished tying the cord about her neck, Sada let her hair drop back down, and she examined the gemstone with a loving gaze.

“Just like you,” Nori sighed as he rested his back against a tree, “Besides…seeing as how we’ve made love…you were deserving of a pretty reward!”

“Piss off!” Sada chuckled as she turned and stuck her tongue out at Nori, “Should I then present you with an award for best effort the next time we meet? Or would you need bail money considering I’ve no clue how you came by such a lovely jewel?”

“Good one!” Nori admitted as he allowed Sada to crawl into his lap, “But no…no theft this time. I bought it honestly…almost gave the vendor a heart attack because of it!”

“Oh…so I’m good enough to sleep with but not good enough to go to jail for?” Sada jested and Nori laughed heartily before he kissed her deeply and for a long moment.

“How are…other things?” Nori asked when the embrace broke, “You know…any thing I need to know?”

Sada chuckled and tickled Nori’s beard for a moment, then when she laid her head upon his chest, She answered: “Too soon to tell…but I feel no different. If there was some change I’d let you know!”

“He’ll kill me,” Nori sighed as he played with a plait of Sada’s hair, “The daughter of Thorin Oakenshield…spoiled by some low life thief!”

“Nori,” Sada breathed, “You shouldn’t be so insulting about who you are…I know you as something much more upstanding and pure!”

“What would that be, hm?” Nori inquired, “I’ve never been thought to be upstanding after all!”

Sada straddled Nori, much to the older dwarf’s pleasure, and she said seductively: “Mine.”

Sada flicked her tongue against Nori’s lips and He chuckled when she cried out in surprise as he rolled so that she was beneath him.

“Well then,” Nori observed with a smirk, “Use me the way you think I should be if I am truly yours!”  
****************************************************************************************************************************  
Thrain was bored. 

He’d climbed several trees, but only once found a nest with eggs, probably a blue jays but that was the only exciting thing that he’d found during his long exploration of the woods.

He should have gone off with Fili and Kili.

Where his cousins had gone he wasn’t sure, but it had to be more interesting than his futile efforts to remained entertained.

As always his two cousins were given to whispers and giggles while they each mentioned various names of other’s that were waiting for them, at some secret spot, even before they departed!

Whatever they were doing it had to be some kind of adventure and much more enjoyable than this!

Looking over his shoulder, listening to the distant gurgling of the river, a mischievious thought sprang to Thrain’s mind.

There was nothing wrong with sitting and watching the fish swim, Sada didn’t say he couldn’t do that, it was harmless!

He wouldn’t be to close after all, it was easy to spot fish if you knew what you were looking for, and He knew it would quell his boredom.

He’d sit and watch the fish, and even when Sada got back, maybe they could catch some like they had before.

They’d go home and He would make Daddy laugh when he presented him with a large trout just like the one he’d managed to catch before!

With a sniff, Thrain tossed the stick he’d been using as a switch aside, and bounded toward the river.  
******************************************************************************************************************************  
Sada chuckled as Nori struggled to lace her vest, while she laced the front of his breeches closed with no problem.

“Shall I?” She asked, and Nori shook his head, just as he finished the task with a triumphant grunt.

“It’s what I like,” He explained as He rose and offered a hand to Sada, “You take your clothes off for me, I put them back on, it’s only the right thing to do!”

“Oh I see!” Sada giggled just before giving Nori a peck on the cheek, “though you need more practice! Well..I hate to do this…but I’ve got to fetch Thrain and~”

“Thrain?” Nori asked, his brow furrowing, “Where is he?”

“Probably stealing eggs from nests!” Sada joked, “It shouldn’t take long to find him as~”

“You left him alone?” Nori snapped, “Sada…you shouldn’t have done that!”

“Nori,” Sada started with a shocked laugh, “He’s a smart child and~”

“But a child no less!” Nori pointed out as he turned and hurried off, “Come on! Let’s go get him!”


	16. Chapter Sixteen

“Bofur! BOFUR! Call him off!”

Bofur hurried from the back of his shop, his eyes going wide with horror, as he observed Nori holding a child’s chair up to block Bifur’s fists.

“Bifur! Leave ‘im!” Bofur ordered as he rushed over and placed himself between his friend and cousin, “He’s just come to see me is all! BIFUR!”

“You gotta get to the river Bo!” Nori pressed as he still held the chair out in front of him; “It’s bad! It’s very bad!”

“What…?” Bofur asked, looking over his shoulder at Nori whose eyes were full of panic and fear, “Why?”

“Sada!” Nori pressed, and to his relief Bifur lowered his fists then, “There’s been an accident!”

“Sada?” barked Bifur angrily, “What did you do to ‘er?”

“I did nothing!” Nori protested, refusing to put the small chair down, “But she needs help!”

“Oh…Mahal, please, no!” Bofur gasped as he dashed from the shop while Nori and Bifur both followed quickly after him.  
***************************************************************************************************************************  
His heart was pounding in his ears, the taste of blood was in his throat, but Bofur refused to slow and pounded his footprints into the dry soil with more fervors than he’d ever known in his entire life.

The river came into few, and he saw her then, on her knees and rocking back and fourth wildly while her wails filled the early evening sky.

‘No,’ Bofur thought as he clambered toward her and called out her name, ‘No, no, no! This can’t be happenin’!’

“Sada!” Bofur gasped as he dropped to his knees beside his hysterical niece, “Oh…give ‘im here! Give ‘im to me! Did ye hear? Gimme Thrain, NOW!”

“I-I-I t-tried to b-bring him back!” Sada declared through choking sobs as her wet hair dripped upon Thrain’s still face, “But-b-but I think it’s been too long…I can’t do it! I can’t do it!”

“Give-him-to-me!” Bofur pressed through gritted teeth, “Let’s get him to Oin!”

Just then Nori and Bifur arrived, both struggling to catch their breaths as Bofur pulled the soaking wet, blue faced, boy from Sada’s arms and rose.

“Get ‘er back to me house,” He ordered Nori and Bifur, “I’ll be there as soon as I can. Sada…ye go with them now, it’s going to be alright.”

Nori, with Bifur’s aide, hoisted Sada to her feet and She swayed, thumping against Nori’s chest.

“‘S my fault,” Sada whimpered as She watched Bofur once again break into a desperate run, “I didn’t listen.”

“Come now,” Nori urged gently, “Let’s get you to Bofur’s and outta those wet clothes…you almost drowned trying to pull Thrain out of the river!”

“I should have,” Sada insisted while Nori forced her to walk, “I should have died. It should’ve been me.”

“Don’t say that,” Nori sighed, “It was an accident and…and there’s still a chance!”

Bifur whimpered and, when Nori looked over his shoulder, he realized the older dwarf was trying to contain his own tears.

“There is none,” Sada yelped as she nearly collapsed to the earth, “He…He was blue!”

“Sada,” Nori sighed, “Please…let’s get you to Bofur’s alright? You need to rest!”  
*************************************************************************************************************************  
Today had been a good day, and Thorin dared to smile to himself, and he started to clean up his shop for the night.

For once, instead of feeling a deep sadness at the prospect of going to a home no longer occupied by the love of his life, He felt happy and eager. 

He’d return home and have the days last meal with his daughter and son, his nephews, and he’d have to sit through his little boys excited chatter about his newest adventures at the river and in the forest.

“Thorin,” a voice announced, Balin’s, “I need to speak with ye.”

Thorin turned around, grabbing a cloth to clean the soot from his hands, and he offered pleasantly: “You will have to do so as I walk. I’m expected home.”

“I’m afraid I must escort ye to the apothecary,” Balin sighed softly, “I must take ye there now.”

A great, devastating feeling sunk deep into the exiled king and the cloth fluttered from his hands to the cluttered floor of his shop.

“Balin…” Thorin started, “Why?”

“There…there’s been an accident,” Balin explained in a trembling voice, “Please…let me take ye.”

“My…My children? My nephews?” Thorin asked as he took a step forward, “Tell me!”

“Please,” Balin requested again as he bowed his head and extended his arm toward the door, “We must go. I…You're going to go through something very hard tonight, lad.”

Thorin’s steps faltered and his blue-grey eyes filled with disbelief and fear; As He shook his head slowly and hurried past Balin, the old dwarf lord heard him mutter: “No!”


	17. Chapter Seventeen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thrain has died and an enraged, heart broken Thorin comes to collect and berate a devastated Sada at Bofur's.
> 
> Someone arrives and makes a shocking "confession."

“It’s fine, Lass, ye go ahead and cry…I’m not goin’ anywhere.” 

Bofur, though he was exhausted, held his niece to his shoulder as they sat upon the couch in his home.

He last saw Sada as a quivering mess at the river, and when He’d returned home with the tragic news, He found her in the same state.

Bombur, seated in a chair that dipped painfully low to the floor, sighed and wiped his eyes with a pudgy thumb while cousin Bifur seemed to be having trouble absorbing all that had occurred on day that had started out so well. 

Sada whimpered again, Bofur kept his arms firmly around her, and He planted a kiss into her hair. 

“Did…did father say anything when you saw him?” Sada inquired with a sniffle; “It’s late…I…I think that I should go home.”

“He’ll be along when he can lass,” Bofur explained softly, “He probably went to go find Fili and Kili first. If anythin’ ye can stay here tonight if it gets too late.”

“Is anyone hungry?” Bombur asked softly, rising from the chair and heading to the kitchen, “I think I’ll get supper started.”

“Aye,” Bofur replied, “Just a small meal though brother, Sada, can ye bring yer self to eat?”

Before Sada could answer, the front door exploded open and Thorin stomped through, just a Bofur and Bifur sprang to their feet defensively.

“WHERE WERE YOU?” Thorin roared turning his bloodstained eyes on his eldest, and only surviving, child “ANSWER ME!”

“Whoa!” Bofur spat, stepping front of a wide-eyed Sada, just as Fili and Kili dashed inside behind their uncle, “This is not the time!”

“It-is-the-perfect time!” Thorin seethed, “My son-her brother-is dead…YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO WATCHING HIM YOU STUPID FOOL!”

“Uncle!” Fili pled, “Please…people are starting to watch from outside, “Let’s get home, yeah, we all just need to…to rest for a moment!”

Tears coursed down Sada’s cheeks, and even though Bofur protested with a shake of his head, She rose from the couch.

“I…I was…I thought he would play in the forest,” She confessed, “He promised that he wouldn’t go near the river…”

“He was a child!” Thorin said, almost laughing, “You know he almost never keeps a promise! He was a baby!”

Bofur was lightening quick and instantly dashed around Thorin and shoved Bifur, clenching a dagger in his hand, up against the wall and ordered him to drop the weapon and to calm down in Khuzdul.

Kili began to help restrain Bifur, Bofur’s words having no effect, and he looked desperately at Fili whom again pressed: “Please! This isn’t right! Uncle, let’s just go home! It’s upsetting everyone!”

“Where-were-you!” Thorin demanded again through the gritted teeth, his fists clenched, “Why would you be so selfish and abandon your little brother the way you did?”

“Father I…I’m sorry I just~”

“Why didn’t you save him?” Thorin demanded, his voice cracking as his grief overcame his anger, “You could’ve saved him…How could you let him die!”

“She was with me Thorin,” a voice confessed from the open door, and all turned to observe the visitor in stunned silence.

Nori stepped inside Bofur’s household, bowed low to Thorin, and explained: “I asked to speak with her…she was reluctant but I pressed it upon her. I asked Thrain to wait…I made Him promise not to go near the river and I made Sada leave him alone. I kept her away from Thrain for far too long… this is my doing and not anyone else’s!”

Thorin observed Nori up and down and then brought his gaze back to Sada, looking very pale and with her eyes swollen with tears, He could see her heart pounding in her chest.

“Is there any truth in his words?” Thorin asked coldly, “Or is he covering for you because you KNEW you were not to affiliate with him even before this horrid day?”

“I…” Sada started, looking at all the stunned faces that gawked at her, “Father…N-Nori and me w-we…”

Before she could give an answer however, whether the truth or another lie, no one heard it for Sada groaned and her eyes rolled back into her skull, an instant before she hit the floor with a violent thud.

“Bombur! Get yer arse out here!” Bofur ordered quickly, just as Bifur whimpered and dropped the dagger, signing with one hand that they all needed to help the unconscious dwarf.

Fili quickly knelt next to Sada and, touching her face gently, begged her to wake.

“Uncle,” Kili asked, “Shall I send for Oin? Go get him?” 

“No,” Thorin sniffed as Bombur appeared and immediately came to his nieces aide, “She’ll be fine…probably some kind of shock. Let her rest here for the night.”

“What?” Bofur asked in anger and amazement, “She needs ‘er Daddy!”

“I need to be alone!” Thorin countered savagely, then he turned his blazing eyes on Nori, “and I need to have a word with this low life scum!”


	18. Chapter Eighteen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sada is sickly while resting at her uncles, Nori sits in jail, and a late night visitor stops by.

“Oh…bloody-here, go here lass, it’s gonna be alright!”

Sada vomited into the basin her Uncle Bofur offered her, and when she finished, her uncle wiped her mouth with his handkerchief.

“How long have I been sleeping?” Sada asked, “What time is it?”

“Ye slept through the night and all the way past noon,” Bofur explained as he helped Sada to lie down again.

Stroking Sada’s hair, Bofur added with a sigh: “Ye got worked into quite a state…gotta nasty bump on yer head too!”

Sada huffed, took a deep breath, and fought her growing nausea while Bofur continued to stroke her hair.

“Oin heard ye had spell and sent some tea,” Bofur explained after a moment of silence had passed, “He thought the bump might cause ye some dizziness and whatnot, obviously he was right, Do ye think you could take some?”

“No,” Sada admitted, “I feel so odd as it is…I just want to rest before I go home.”

“Uh…Yer…Thrain’s service is to be held in three days time. Yer more than welcome to stay with me and Bifur until then.”

“For three days,” Sada asked with disbelieving chuckle, “You mean father doesn’t want me home, right?”

“He’s grieving lass,” Bofur explained with a sigh, “Ye must understand…it’s hard to explain but…He never thought he’d have bury one of his own children before him.”

“And He blames me for it,” Sada pointed out as she rolled onto her side, “What happened to Nori?”

“He’s in jail,” Bofur stated flatly, “Been there since yesterday.”

“What?” Sada snapped, her eyes going wide as she rolled and flew up onto her elbows, gawking at her uncle, “He didn’t do anything!”

“Sada,” Bofur cautioned, “He went there of his own accord and ye probably shouldn’t see ‘im right now…Thorin was and is beside himself and he lashed out at Nori…took me and both yer cousins to pull him off. He’s there for his own safety fer now.”

“So…he can get out when he wants, right?” Sada asked softly.

Bofur smirked as he cast his niece a disappointed stare.

“Ye should concern yer self with more important matters,” Bofur explained as he rose from the side of the bed, “Ye won’t be seein’ Nori fer awhile any ways!”

“What do you mean?” Sada asked, a wave of nausea overcoming her for a moment, “Uncle…I know he said it was his fault…but Nori did nothing!”

“Sada,” Bofur moaned, pinching the bridge of his nose as he thought, “Yer little brother is gone…put yer…longings aside for now and forget them!”

“I…” Sada started, but again Bofur brought her the basin just as she began to vomit again, with a loud moan afterward, Sada rolled back onto her side and curled into a ball.

“Ye rest,” Bofur ordered as he rubbed his nieces back, “We’ll talk later when yer feelin’ better.”  
******************************************************************************************************************************  
She was halfway awake and freezing, even though Bofur had covered her with a heavy blanket, and instantly Sada knew what was happening.

“Mama?” She asked, “Is that you?”

“Yes love,” Nola answered while sitting on the bed beside her daughter though no weight registered from where she sat.

“I killed him Mama,” Sada mumbled groggily, “I thought you just wanted me to leave Nori alone…that you were being stubborn like the rest…why couldn’t you just tell me?”

“It was an accident,” Nola explained as her cold hand rested on Sada’s shoulder, “Fate changes ever minute, every second…I couldn’t be sure. I only…had a sense.”

“I failed,” Sada said as tears burned at her eyes, “I dreamed it…I dreamed of struggling in water, screaming like crazy and almost drowning, I assumed it would be me and I was wrong! Now Daddy…poor daddy…”

“Shh,” Nola urged gently, “Yer father is strong-he has to be-and so must you be. Now more than ever!”

“I will be,” Sada promised, “I’m never going to disappoint you or Daddy ever again!”

Nola chuckled, and Sada felt the faintest touch, like butterfly wings fluttering against her cheek.

“Sleep, my sweet girl, You’ll have company tomorrow.”


	19. Chapter Ninteen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Short by majorly important chapter.

There was fire, roaring fire everywhere!

Devouring buildings and lighting the night sky so brightly it looked as though it were dawn.

“SADA! Where ARE YOU? SADA!” Some frantically called out.

“HELP ME, HELP ME! I’M BURNING, I’M BURNING HELP MEEEE!” A man shrieked in the distance

Just then a poor woman came screaming by engulfed in flames and, as she past Sada, the young dwarf felt the heat and smelled the burning flesh!

With a scream she lurched backward, slamming into the side of an unknown building, and dropped to her knees.

Her hands clenched her ears, trying hard to block out the roar of the flames and the despairing cries of many.

“It’s coming back! Oh God it’s coming back!” Another distant voice declared, Sada gagged as she inhaled smoke, and pressed her forehead to the warm wood.

“The water!” A boy shouted, “Get to the water!”

“Mama!” A child, a poor child, shrieked. “Mama! Help!”

“SADA FOR HEAVEN’S SAKE WHERE ARE YOU?”

“Here!” Sada shouted, coughing on smoke, “I’m over here! Help me!”

There came then, heavy footsteps, and they didn’t stop until they were directly in front of where Sada kneeled. 

“Look at me,” A familiar voice commanded, and Sada instantly obeyed and lifted her head.

Falling back on her bottom, Sada screamed and scooted away as she sobbed: “Daddy? Daddy what’s happened?”

Inclining his head, exposing the massive wound at the side of his throat, an armor clad and bloody Thorin advised: “Don’t fail him where I failed you!”

 

“Sada! It’s me it’s Bofur! Stop, Sada, stop! Yer just dreaming! Calm down baby! Just calm down!”

“He’s going to die! He’s going to die!” Sada shrieked, and just then a concerned voice asked from the doorway: “Shall a fetch the healer?”

“Yes!” Bofur answered, “Go now, thank you Ezrin, I’ll stay with her-OW-Sada…please! Calm down!”

“They were burning! They were all burning and-and even little children too!” Sada sobbed, “I’m killing them ! I’m killing all of them! j-j-just like Orla!”

“Ezrin, GO!” Bofur snapped, “She’ll be alright, she’s just…hurting-OW-could ye send in me brother on yer way out…I-DAMN IT SADA-I think I’ll need to restrain her until Oin gets here!”

“Yes,” Ezrin agreed, “I’ll be back as soon as I can!”

When he gone, and when Bombur had arrived and started to help, Bofur restrained his niece as gently as he could.

“Shhh!” Bofur urged when it seemed Sada’s fit was passing, “I’ve sent fer Oin…yer just over tired is all, that bump on yer head is makin’ ye very confused…it was just a dream baby girl…only a dream!”

“Nooooo!” Sada sobbed inconsolably, “I don’t just dream…I don’t just dream!”


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sada wakens and received a much unwanted surprise.

'Sada," A voice in the darkness of her dream called, "Wake now love...much is happening...pay attention!'

When the voice subsided, when she began to wake, Sada knew instantly she’d been sedated. It took much effort just to open her eyes to find that it was pitch black in the room where she lay.

What time of night it was, she couldn’t be sure, but as Sada sat up she was instantly assaulted by a violent wave of nausea and dizziness that she fought down until she was certain she wouldn’t vomit or faint again.

At inspecting the knot on the side of her head, She stifled a gasp, as her fingers touched the massive and very sore lump.

“No wonder I feel so odd!” Sada mumbled, “It feels like I’m growing a horn!”

With a sigh, making sure to take her time, Sada eased her self from the bed and made her way out into the black corridor.

She could hear the co-mingling snores of her Uncle and First Cousin, yet she saw a dim light coming from the kitchen.

Was Bombur still here? 

Sada vaguely recalled how her massive Uncle had been there just as Oin arrived and pressed a damp, stinking cloth over her nose and mouth. But she’d never known him to spend a night away from his wife and two small children.

“Uncle Bombur,” Sada called quietly as she tiptoed to where the candlelight shone, “What time do you have?”

Sada cried out in surprise, her face grew hot and red, and she dove back around the corner just as Ezrin leapt to his feet and began to offer quick apologies.

“I’m sorry!” He exclaimed, “Your Uncles thought it would be best if one of us stayed up through the night…in case you woke…wh-which you did!”

Peeking around the corner, completely ashamed to only be clothed in her long under garment, Sada cleared her throat and replied: “I should’ve called out…I don’t know what I was thinking!”

“Accidents happen,” Ezrin offered, “Still…are you feeling better?”

“Um…let me…l-let me dress and when I return I’ll inform you as to whether or not my spirits have improved!” Sada laughed softly, “I’ll just be a moment.”

 

After throwing on her dress, still stinking of the river, Sada met Ezrin at the table and offered a courteous bow just before she sat down across from him.

“I’d no idea that you knew where My Uncle lived,” Sada confessed, turning down Ezrin’s offer of tea with a wave of one hand, “Nor did I have any clue that you were coming to Ered Luin!"

Ezrin, his hands clasped over his taut stomach as he slouched in his chair, smirked and answered: “I knew where he lived before I came…I’d meant it to be a surprise for you…I understand that not long from now you’re to come of age.”

Sada, crossing her legs appropriately and settling her hands in her lap, nodded slowly but confessed: "Things…might not happen for me so soon-not now-there’s much to consider and…hey, wait, how did you know where my Uncle lived if you’ve never been here before?” 

Ezrin sipped his tea, then gulped it, and set the cup down as he offered an apologetic smile.

“I’ve been keeping in contact with your father, and your uncle, for sometime now. Privately.”

“What?” Sada gaped, “Why?”

Even in the dim candlelight, Sada could tell Ezrin was blushing, and the young constable and leather worker chuckled nervously while Sada felt as though she would vomit again.


	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sada gets into a heated argument with Bofur...and returns home to find her father in a very disturbing state.

“Please, Uncle Bo, it’s nasty!”

“It’s needed!” Bofur pressed, holding the cup under Sada’s nose, “It’ll help quell those pains ye’ve been havin’!”

Sighing, Sada at last took the cup and swallowed the foul liquid in one gulp, dramatically gagging after she’d done so.

“Yer knot’s gotten smaller,” Bofur observed gently placing his hand over the bump on Sada’s head, “Doesn’t look anythin’ like it did in the beginning, you’ll be back to havin’ just the one head in no time!”

“But I’ll have more annoyances to deal with even after it’s gone!” Sada spat, shoving the cup into Bofur’s hands, “How could you do it?” 

“Do what?” Bofur asked, “Give ye yer medicine? Yer father would ‘ave me by me ears if I didn’t!”

“That wouldn’t bother me, honestly!” Sada griped, her glare startling her uncle, “I’m sure you’ll be all better by the time I marry Ezrin!”

“Lass,” Bofur sighed when he finally understood Sada’s outburst, “He started writing Thorin…and then as is traditional he started writing to me! But I warned ye that ye should’ve taken his feelings into account!”

“So should have you!” Sada countered, “He’s just a very close friend and I’ve made no declaration to him in any way! Not once in any of the letters I wrote!”

“The final decision will be yours,” Bofur pressed, his tone becoming hard, “Often…many couples start off as friends. It was the same fer your Daddy and Mama! Even I can see why yer father likes him…Ezrin’s a fine fellow who sat up through the night to make sure you would be cared for even when your blood kin were all asleep!”

Sada snorted and shook her head in disbelief; “You realize,” She sighed, “That even though that the final decision will be mine…I’ll have no choice but to give an answer that isn't mine, right?”

“That remains to be seen,” Bofur pointed out in a matter-of-fact tone, “Ezrin will be staying for some time, long after your comin’ of age celebration, things change after a long while.”

“I can’t believe I’m finding all of this out NOW!” Sada shouted, and Bofur cast her a befuddled look, “Now at this very time? This is heartless!”

“Sada,” Bofur sighed, his eyes filling with anger, “Yer brother wasn’t meant to die…all o’ this was meant to be a surprise after all! Besides…I thought you liked Ezrin enough to at least…give the boy a chance!”

“I love Nori!” Sada declared, and Her Uncle moaned and rolled his eyes, just before rubbing his hands over his face for a few moments.

“He’s been out of the jail,” Bofur explained, “Even before you had that fit that made Oin sedate ye! If he loved you, lass, why hasn’t he come by?”

“You said that Daddy almost killed him!” Sada countered, “He’s probably just…waiting.”

Bofur bit his lower lip, approached Sada slowly and when his hands cupped his nieces face, He gently pointed out: “If he truly cared fer ye-loved ye-and wanted to know if ye were alright after yer spell…nothin’ would have stopped him from findin’ out!”

Sada jerked free and began heading for the door.

“Come on!” She ordered, “You said Daddy needed me to go home to get ready for the funeral!”  
******************************************************************************************************************************  
After getting home, taking a much needed bath, Sada dressed in the proper attire and sneered at her reflection in the mirror.

She knew she had a duty and that She had to be there for her family; Yet all Sada wanted to do was just strip off her mourning dress and crawl into a hole until night fell.

Sticking her tongue out at her refection Sada spun around, screamed and staggered backward, nearly knocking over the full length mirror while Her father observed with a faint smile.

Here father, Thorin Oakenshield, was smiling? And on such a terrible day?

Something was indeed very, very wrong!

Sada gulped, regained her composure, and performed a rare curtsy for her father whom bid her to come to him.

“I don’t much care for these garments either,” He confessed as he began to toy with a curled lock of his confounded daughter’s dark hair, “I’ve had to wear them too often. How are you, otherwise, I mean?”

Sada shrugged and, as it had been on that terrible day he’d arrived in the Iron Hills, Thorin hugged his daughter close.

The embrace oddly pained Sada, as though her bones were overworked, and only after offering her own weak hug in return did she break the embrace.

“I’m fine,” Sada answered, “Just…you know…”

Thorin smirked and nodded; “It won’t be long now…and we can put this day behind us and you can start preparing for your celebration.” 

“Oh, Daddy,” Sada sighed, “I really don’t think we should…celebrate so soon.”

“Ezrin came for just that occasion,” Thorin pointed out, “and it will do you some good-I hope-to start preparing for what I hope will be a merry occasion.”

“Me?” Sada asked as Thorin gestured for her to follow him, “But…I thought that the parents-that you-were supposed to take care of it.”

“Oh I do wish I could,” Thorin offered as offered his arm to Sada, “But you’ll have Bofur to stand in my place. I’ve got to leave, you see, for something very important.”

‘Oh, that explains it,’ Sada realized with a sigh, ‘He’s gotten more word about him!’

“Do you…must you go?” Sada asked softly, and Thorin stopped escorting Her long enough to take the hand that clasped his muscled arm and press it to his lips.

A confirmation, and an apology, Sada knew.

“I’m…terribly sorry by the way,” Thorin added as he herded himself and Sada outside of their home where many, including Bofur and Boumbur, waited to escort them to the great hall so the service could begin, “For how I…for making you faint.”

Another blasted wave of nausea overcame Sada then, stalling her steps, and Thorin observed his only child with concern.

“Sada?” He asked, “What is it?”

“Oh, nothing, father…just haven’t slept well and my head still hurts some.”

“Hm,” Thorin sniffed, “We shall have you put to bed as soon as this…painful moment is nothing more than a nightmare memory.”


	22. Chapter 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> when Thorin departs to search out his father, Sada discover her symptoms are persisting...long after she's healed from her fainting spell.

Time had seemed to slow since Thrain's passing. 

Then, suddenly, the day came for her father to depart.

Not even an hour had passed, after Thorin’s early morning departure, before Sada found herself on her knees in her stool closet, vomiting violently.

“Perhaps I should take you to Oin” Fili offered as he waited in his cousin’s bedroom, just as Sada emerged from her toilet, “Uncle told me to watch over you…and I don’t like what I’m seeing!”

“It’s just a side affect,” Sada explained as she went to her water basin and splashed water on her face, “O-of that awful tea Oin had me drink! Thank Mahal that I’m all out now…don’t need it any more any ways!”

“Well…if you think so,” Fili replied, “But do promise me you’ll have me escort you to Oin if your symptoms persist! You’ve been doing that ever since you got home!”

Yes, Sada thought as Fili left, she had been sick for quite sometime.

Actually, she’d started to feel differently, even before her fainting spell several days ago. 

But certain, troubling, symptoms unmercifully tormented her!

She’d almost had to leave her poor brother’s service in the middle of it, over come again, but she’d fought that unpleasant moment off while her father eyed her suspiciously.

Suddenly she recalled Nori, or rather, something he’d asked her the last time they’d met for another one of their passionate trysts.

"...anything I need to know?..."

Sada gasped, feeling as though floating, and she looked down at her self, her hands forming a ‘v’ at her abdomen before they relaxed and coasted up her gown to her breasts.

The slightest brush over them, caused her to flinch, as if badly bruised.

Tears, fearful and heavy, brimmed in her eyes and She whispered in a trembling voice: “Mama?”

Turning, staring desperately at the ethereal figure that had come, Sada choked as she asked: “Tell me!”

Nola sighed, inclined her head, and offered a very sympathetic smile.

“My sweet girl,” She observed, “You must be strong...”

*****************************************************************************************************************************

Getting Ezrin, and trying to convince her cousins, to escort Her had been a battle.

Both Fili and Kili had protested, but after explaining to them it was all to do with flower arrangements and dress making, they quickly stilled their tongues and allowed Ezrin to walk Sada through Ered Luin.

They’d spent the day, a painfully boring ordeal, doing just that until Sada decided that it was time to get to the apothecary.

“Ezrin,” Sada asked sweetly, “I wonder…could you secure us a table at that restaurant? I’m just going to buy some knick-knacks…for my room and I’m sure you’re ready for a bite to eat!”

Following the point of her finger, Ezrin nodded and smiled, and without a word went about the task Sada had asked him to do.

If anything, and Sada smiled, He was loyal and desperate to make a good impression; He’d make someone a fine husband one day.

Still, she had to be quick, and Sada pulled her hood low and hurried off to the apothecary. Hoping against all hope no one saw her and that Ezrin would not try and seek her out before her business there was done.

******************************************************************************************************************************

“It’s that way with many, they keep askin’ too, but I’ve done this a lot lass! Even before my hair went gray and my hearin’ started to fade. My examination…is accurate. I’d say close to…six weeks.”

Warm tears gushed from Sada’s eyes, she was trembling all over, and she covered her mouth with her hand as she began to sob.

“Hey,” Oin sighed softly as he finished washing his hands and turned to face Sada, “Hey now! ‘S not a bad thing…Yer mother was the same. Scared and worried…but it worked out fer ‘er after all!”

“But she’s dead,” Sada whimpered, “and…and Daddy-everybody-they’ve been through so much because of me already!”

Oin sighed and came to sit next to Sada, his arm draping around her shoulders, the healer asked: “Don’t ye think…just maybe…that this will be a good thing?”

“How can it be?” Sada asked, “I’m not married-I’m not even considered of age yet-and Daddy…there’s got to be something you can do Master Oin…there has to be something that you can give me!”

Oin squeezed her about the shoulders, rose, and began gathering various dried herbs that hung over their heads as he began to explain:

“I have helped many, in the way yer askin’, and while some had no regrets…other’s have trouble living with their decision after it is all said and done.”

“But Oin,” Sada sniffled, “It’s…it’s not a good idea-not now-and besides that just because I’m Thorin’s daughter~”

“Ye know the father, aye?” Oin asked, after he’d gathered the herbs he needed, “I’m sure ye do!”

“Well yes!” Sada sighed, “But I don’t see how he can help given that Daddy~”

“At least talk to ‘im,” Oin suggested as he began to work at his table, “See what he thinks! As far as yer own father? I dunno Sada but…though I don’t think he’s ever admitted it, he does love children! This would be his grandchild and tha’s something to keep in mind. Since tellin’ him is obviously what’s so scary for you right now!”

“I’ve let him down so much,” Sada explained with a shrug, “He wants me to marry an old friend…how can I now?”

Oin, having mixed and measured the correct herbs, came and took Sada’s hand in his and, with his other, placed a small satchel in her palm.

“Fer the little one,” He explained softly, “Make tea every morning. Oh, and Don’t ferget ye have eleven months… almost five before ye start to show…ye have plenty of time to tell yer father…and to make any decisions you think would be best fer all concerned.”


	23. Chapter Twenty-Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Filler Chapter.

Finding Ezrin had been easy enough, Dori was more than happy to escort Sada, to the back of the restaurant where He’d been waiting patiently.

“Mr. Dori,” Sada inquired just when their host started to go, “May I ask about the welfare of your brother?”

“He’s doing quite well, thank you!” Dori announced cheerfully, “His ribs don’t bother him as much now and he’s finally able to open his right eye!”

Sada flinched as Dori headed off to deal with a demanding customer, and when she turned her gaze on Ezrin, she instantly felt a sense of guilt.

“Sorry,” She offered, sipping some water, “He’s just…He’s a friend.”

“I understand,” Ezrin replied as he opened his menu, “I heard from your Uncle what happened to him.”

‘Did you?’ Sada wondered, curious as to how much Bofur had divulged, yet she dismissed the question and began to look through her own menu.

“No knick-knacks?” Ezrin asked from behind his menu, and Sada offered up the best false chuckle she could.

“None to my liking,” She lied, “I’m sorry to have kept you waiting.”

“Oh, don’t be,” Ezrin offered as he at last set his menu aside, “That Dori fellow is quite a character!”  
**************************************************************************************************************************

“Did she make you carry all of her things?” Kili has teased the moment She and Ezrin had arrived back home, “Because that’s what she makes us do!”

“You’ll be happy to know that I made him carry nothing!” Sada spat back as She removed her cloak, “I reserve that honor only for the most…important of jack asses!”

“Oh, ha ha!” Kili snorted, stomping his feet as he headed out the door Sada and Ezrin had just entered through, “I’m going to Mr. Dwalin’s!”

“That was rather clever,” Ezrin admitted as he removed his hat and tucked it under his arms, “So…I imagine you’ll retire until supper?”

Sada nodded and, to her great surprise, Ezrin leaned in and tenderly kissed her cheek, just before bidding her a good rest and disappearing around the corner.

“Well…that’s something!” Fili chuckled, sitting up from where he lay on a nearby sofa, “He really likes you!”

“How long have you been spying?” Sada demanded as she entered the den and leaned over the sofa to punch Fili on his shoulder, “Not even Daddy would approve!”

“I wasn’t spying, you woke me with your chatter,” Fili explained, playfully tickling at Sada’s ribs.

“But I heard what you said to Kili…that was great!”

Sada chuckled, suddenly recalling her meeting with Oin, and her face fell so drastically that Fili rose and came around the couch to observe her closely.

“What?” Her cousins demanded gently, “What’s wrong? Still sick?”

“No!” Sada laughed, smoothing her hair with both hands, “I just…so much is going on…and I was at Dori’s restaurant earlier and…”

Sada flailed her hands before offering a chuckle; “I’m alight!”

“Oh,” Fili breathed, “Well…don’t trouble your self about it too much, yeah? Why don’t you go lie down for a nap…you still look pale.”

Sada nodded and headed past Fili and in the direction of her room.

“Sada,” Fili called softly and suddenly, and when she’d turned to face him, He hesitated just as he admitted:

“I’m glad you and Ezrin enjoyed each other’s company today!”


	24. Chapter Twenty-Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When She's startled awake, from another disturbing dream, Sada encounters a surprising visitor...and makes a final decision regarding the future.

She woke trembling and drenched in a cold sweat, the rapping at her bedroom door having pulled her from another disturbing dream, and Sada took a few breaths before calling out:

“A…a-a moment! Just a moment!”’ Sada stammered as she rose unsteadily, “I’m coming!”

When she opened the door, her heart went cold, and she stumbled over her words as she stared into Fili’s dark galare.

“He refuses to leave until you’ve spoken to him,” Fili explained, “I’d hate to get anyone-especially Dwalin-involved as you and I both know it’ll get back to Thorin!”

“What do you mean?” Sada demanded, “Who is here?”

Fili arched an eyebrow and inclined his head.

“Who do you think?”  
*****************************************************************************************************************************  
“Nori!?” Sada gasped, slamming the front door shut behind her, “You shouldn’t be here because Daddy’s got a guest and-Oh Mahal!…your face!”

Nori, the right side of his face one huge bruise, smirked and mumbled: “You should see my ribs!”

Sada began to reach toward the dwarf’s blackened face, but then jerked her hand away, fearing she would harm him even more.

“It’s fine,” Nori said, taking Sada’s hand in his. 

Even though she protested with physical hesitation, She at last allowed her lover to place her hand delicately on the unwounded side of his face.

“I’m so sorry…” Sada offered, tears in her eyes, “…I’m so grateful to you Nori…so scared!”

“Don’t be!” Nori protested, pulling Sada into his arms, “I’m fine and I’m not going to leave you again!”

Sada sniffled then, reality setting in, and she pulled free of Nori’s embrace.

For a long, tense moment she stared at him with her tears falling freely.

“But I’m leaving you,” She gasped, “I…I won’t have this happen again…I won’t hurt anyone else.”

“What?” Nori asked, chuckling in utter surprise, “Darling, Sada, this wasn’t your fault! I knew your father’s temper! And Thrain wasn’t your fault either!”

“Even you told me that I shouldn’t have left him alone!” Sada argued, “But I did and he drowned and you were nearly beaten to death by my own father! Plus there’s something else…something else going on.”

Her stomach went cold and tight, she averted her gaze and stared at Nori’s boots, trying to find the right words.

“What else?” Nori asked, lifting Sada’s chin with a single finger, forcing her to look at him.

Oin’s words echoed in Sada’s memory and, with a garbled sob, She declared:

“I’m going to give Ezrin a chance. It’s over between you and me, go away, goodbye Nori!”

She had to wrench her wrist free of his grasp, block out Nori’s disbelieving protests, but at last Sada managed to get back inside and dash past Fili whom bid her to wait.  
****************************************************************************************************************************  
She’d been so wrong in the past! 

She'd destroyed the present!

Her mother and little brother were dead and buried and her father was out chasing, what Sada knew, was a ghost.

‘Oh Daddy,’ Sada thought as she flung herself upon her bed and buried her face into a pillow, “If only you’d believed me all that time ago! If only I’d tried harder to convince you, maybe none of this horror would’ve ocurred!’

Sniffling, Sada rolled onto her back, her hands resting atop one another upon her abdomen.

She wondered if the child was sleeping, or if it could sleep, or if she should make sure that that was all it would ever do.

Closing her eyes, the chill came, and Sada uttered a shaky sigh when a great freeze settled upon her hands.

“I’ve got to do it,” Sada whispered, “It’s the best thing to do for all involved!”

“Child,” Nola sighed, “So it has been seen…you’re on the path you must be…but I bid you Sada, my sweet daughter, never let your strength wane. It will be the only thing you have to comfort you…for a very long time.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So ends 'book two'...stay tuned for 'book three'


End file.
